Here's Two Good Reasons to Have a Baby

"Um, don't you usually tell me to stay away from the stove?"

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This one seems a little too aware of his fate.

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And on the Other Hand, I Have Five Fingers

Pure, unadulterated evil.

Ah, Halloween. A time of costumes and candy and little children mumbling something approximating "trick or treat" with no real understanding why that results in being given candy, but who argues with candy? (They are so cute, all dressed up and mumbling and confused.)

Unless you're a fundy, in which case Halloween is an industry promoting ungodly fear which will tremble before your refusal to buy candy and costumes. Yes, these people can turn any celebration into a spiritual fight of epic proportions and turn any mundane action into a mighty blow for their god worthy of Russell Crowe demanding whether or not you are entertained.

So, let's review the scariest things you can do this Halloween, from people who apparently know neither fear nor fun.

The scariest thing you can do this Halloween is to not make light of evil.

Dude, who's making light of Hitler or genocide? Oh, you don't mean evil evil, you mean pretend evil. Okay, then.

The scariest thing you can do this Halloween is to not be fearful. The media wants you to be afraid of everything from overpopulation to global warming. The politicians want you to be afraid of the economy and the election.

And that has what to do with Halloween? Stay on topic, dude.

The scariest thing you can do this Halloween is to completely skip Halloween and remember Reformation Day . . . But, to remember the Reformers instead of Halloween is very scary to the world.

Look, you may spend your time cowering from celebrations of reformation, but no, celebrating Reformation instead of Halloween is not frightening to the rest of us. It's a little weird, but not scary.

The scariest thing you can do this Halloween is to refuse to watch or allow your children to watch any of the toxic Halloween and Horror films emerging from Hollywood.

*sigh* I love horror films (not that torture porn stuff, just horror), but you don't have to. You certainly are welcome to restrict your children from watching such films (it's not like i'd let a small child watch them either*). It's not exactly a revolutionary act to control what your children view.

The scariest thing you can do this Halloween is to get on your knees as a mother and father and pray that the Lord will send you many, many children who will fear God, not man — children who will especially shun the glorification of witchcraft, the bondage of ungodly fear, and the “cute-ification” of evil that is promoted through holidays like Halloween. Cultures that toy with evil end up being cultures of death. The Christian response is to be a people of life. That means babies. Lots of them.

Wow. That went in a direction I wasn't prepared for. Yeah, using my vagina like a clown car does scare me. Touché , sir, touché . Not sure what that has to do with Halloween, but yes, you scared me.

*Hilarious story from when my niece was 4 or 5. I was taking a shower, so I let her watch cartoons to keep her out of trouble. Once I was out of the shower, I called down to the living room to ask her what she was watching and she says, "Some Halloween movie." Then I hear "huh huh huh" aka The Jason Sound. She wasn't watching "some Halloween movie", she was watching "Halloween". I nearly killed myself trying to get to the TV to turn it off.

Satan's Favorite Holiday!

Turns out, it's mine, too! (C'mon, I'm into cosplay, were you surprised I'm a Halloween freak?)

Kimberly Daniels, who ministers to people involved in the occult (which means she ministers to imaginary people, but whatever), has fabulous insights into Halloween: it's Teh Evul!

Halloween—October 31—is considered a holiday in the United States. In fact, it rivals Christmas with regard to how widely celebrated it is. Stores that sell only Halloween-related paraphernalia open up a few months before the day and close shortly after it ends. But is Halloween a holiday that Christians should be observing?

Does anyone in the US need to be told that a) Halloween is October 31st, and b) it's a holiday in the US? (It's not actually a federally recognized holiday, though, banks don't get the day off or anything.) As for stores devoted to Halloween only, so what? We have the same thing in PA with Independence Day and fireworks. I'm not sure what the point is. You don't need to tell anyone in the US that Halloween is a widely celebrated holiday.

The word "holiday" means "holy day." But there is nothing holy about Halloween. The root word of Halloween is "hallow," which means "holy, consecrated and set apart for service." If this holiday is hallowed, whose service is it set apart for? The answer to that question is very easy—Lucifer's!

Wow, really? You're going back to the derivation of words? How about this: the root of the word "sinister" meaning "threatening or evil" is the Latin word for "left". Just as relevant. As for the root of "Halloween", "hallow" is just half the story. It's a shortening of "Hallow's Evening", referring to "All Hallow's Eve", the night before All Saints Day, November 1. Do try to be more accurate, dearheart, it has nothing to do with the Morningstar.

Lucifer is a part of the demonic godhead. Remember, everything God has, the devil has a counterfeit. Halloween is a counterfeit holy day that is dedicated to celebrating the demonic trinity of : the Luciferian Spirit (the false father); the Antichrist Spirit (the false holy spirit); and the Spirit of Belial (the false son).

"Demonic godhead"? I think we're awfully close to blasphemy, dear. According to you own religion, your god created the devil. Anything Satan has, god gave him. As for this business of the trinity of Satan, yeah, find that in the Bible for me. Go ahead, I'll wait.

The key word in discussing Halloween is "dedicated." It is dedicated to darkness and is an accursed season. During Halloween, time-released curses are always loosed. A time-released curse is a period that has been set aside to release demonic activity and to ensnare souls in great measure.

What. The. Fuck. Seriously, "time-released curses are always loosed"? What . . . how . . . are you insane?

You may ask, "Doesn't God have more power than the devil?" Yes, but He has given that power to us. If we do not walk in it, we will become the devil's prey. Witchcraft works through dirty hearts and wrong spirits.

Yeah, that free will thing. It totally sucks!

During this period demons are assigned against those who participate in the rituals and festivities. These demons are automatically drawn to the fetishes that open doors for them to come into the lives of human beings. For example, most of the candy sold during this season has been dedicated and prayed over by witches.

I do not buy candy during the Halloween season. Curses are sent through the tricks and treats of the innocent whether they get it by going door to door or by purchasing it from the local grocery store. The demons cannot tell the difference.

Why is that Christians view the Devil as being significantly more proactive and organized than God? Oh, and the candy has been dedicated and prayed over by witches? Where? At the factories? During transport? At walmart? Is there some division of Mars Candy devoted entirely to dedicating candy to Satan? Think about this for 2 seconds and then consider that this woman may sincerely believe this to be true. Also, at what point is it safe to eat candy? Should I avoid all candy between September and December, or might there still be candy dedicated to Satan on the shelves a month after Halloween?

Even the colors of Halloween (orange, brown and dark red) are dedicated. These colors are connected to the fall equinox, which is around the 20th or 21st of September each year and is sometimes called "Mabon." During this season witches are celebrating the changing of the seasons from summer to fall. They give praise to the gods for the demonic harvest. They pray to the gods of the elements (air, fire, water and earth)

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Yes, the trees themselves are in on this Satanic conspiracy, changing colors to reflect the will of Satan. Also, what part of the country is she in that the colors of Halloween are not orange and black?

Mother earth is highly celebrated during the fall demonic harvest. Witches praise mother earth by bringing her fruits, nuts and herbs. Demons are loosed during these acts of worship. When nice church folk lay out their pumpkins on the church lawn, fill their baskets with nuts and herbs, and fire up their bonfires, the demons get busy. They have no respect for the church grounds. They respect only the sacrifice and do not care if it comes from believers or non-believers.

Really? Baskets of nuts and herbs? What the fuck is she talking about? What part of Halloween is that? I literally have no idea what she is talking about. None.
Yes

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Gathering around bonfires is a common practice in pagan worship. As I remember, the bonfires that I attended during homecoming week when I was in high school were always in the fall. I am amazed at how we ignorantly participate in pagan, occult rituals.

The gods of harvest that the witches worship during their fall festivals are the Corn King and the Harvest Lord. The devil is too stupid to understand that Jesus is the Lord of the Harvest 365 days a year. But we cannot be ignorant of the devices of the enemy. When we pray, we bind the powers of the strong men that people involved in the occult worship.

She's amazed that Homecoming occurs in the fall? How stupid is she?

Halloween is much more than a holiday filled with fun and tricks or treats. It is a time for the gathering of evil that masquerades behind the fictitious characters of Dracula, werewolves, mummies and witches on brooms. The truth is that these demons that have been presented as scary cartoons actually exist. I have prayed for witches who are addicted to drinking blood and howling at the moon.

Good to know you've prayed for liars repeating the bullshit sold by Warnke. Can you say "credulous"?

The word "occult" means "secret." The danger of Halloween is not in the scary things we see but in the secret, wicked, cruel activities that go on behind the scenes. These activities include:

• Sex with demons
• Orgies between animals and humans
• Animal and human sacrifices
• Sacrificing babies to shed innocent blood
• Rape and molestation of adults, children and babies
• Revel nights
• Conjuring of demons and casting of spells
• Release of "time-released" curses against the innocent and the ignorant.

Another abomination that goes on behind the scenes of Halloween is necromancy, or communication with the dead. Séances and contacting spirit guides are very popular on Halloween, so there is a lot of darkness lurking in the air.

none of the above is true. none of the above has ever happened. you are a liar or a fool, and i'm pretty sure your god had something to say about lying.

By the way, this is the description of the author:

Kimberly Daniels is a sought-after conference speaker and preacher. She is the founder of Kimberly Daniels Ministries International (kimberlydaniels.com), Spoken Word Ministries—the church she pastors in Jacksonville, Florida, with her husband, Ardell—A Child of the King Learning Center and Word Bible College. Kim is a recognized prophetic voice as well as the author of several books, including her most recent, Prayers that Bring Change (Charisma House).

She is a recognized prophetic voice- but she can't tell a pack of lies when she spews it. Interesting.

I

Brane Hurtz!

bakugan, sorcery, halloween, christian,

I'd forgotten that Halloween freaks out a lot of fundys. I guess once you believe in the sky fairy and the Jewish zombie, believing in witches and magic is inevitable. But Japanese card games as instruments of the devil? That hurtz mai brane!

The main victims of this blindness are children. Unless we teach them to recognize and resist these dangers, many will welcome the darkness. So let's examine the nature and tactics of this very real spiritual war. Bakugan -- a popular game and online anime (Japanese animation) -- is a useful example.

"One day," so the Bakugan story goes, "cards began to fall from the sky and were picked up by kids all over the world. The cards featured different characters, different environments, and different powers. ...these cards actually corresponded to an alternate world called Vestroia."[4]

"...we invented a wicked new game we called Bakugan," explained the leader of Vestoria's young Battle Brawlers. "That's when the power of the cards was revealed. Each one held its own battling beast.... The battles were intense, and if you chose the wrong card, you lost it and the beast inside."[5]

"...the beast inside!" Those words brought to mind some troubling email letters I've received from embattled teens and young adults. Like the Canadian women, they actually felt as if they had uncontrollable beasts inside. Their descriptions of inner battles -- the nightmarish consequences of obsession with occult role-playing games -- were heartbreaking. They couldn't stop playing -- or block out the frightening images planted in their minds! Nor could they find faithful Christians in their communities who would guide them toward freedom!

First of all, the beast inside the card, not inner demons, or outer demons or whatever. Reading comprehension, try it. Secondly, I like a good rpg as much as the next person, but "obsession", "nightmarish consequences" and "uncontrollable beasts inside"? Srsly?

The weapons used by Bakugan warriors are totally contrary to God's ways. Based on the ancient Chinese force called Ch'i, they flow from the same source as every other occult weapon. Ch'i (or Ki, Prana, etc.) is merely the Eastern label for the spiritual forces once commanded by Canaanite sorcerers, Babylonian magicians, mediaeval alchemists, and secret societies throughout history.[7]

Total misunderstanding of Ch'i, and "Bakugan warriors"? It's a card game. I assume you've heard of them? Also, since the world is not ruled by Canaanite sorcerers, Babylonian magicians or alchemist, I think we can safely say that magic isn't nearly as useful as a sword or a tank.

Their magic is linked to the forcefulness of the human will. It involves mental concentration and firm commands that enable occultists to "cast spells" and "do magic" without hesitation or moral consideration.

Magic is easy, according to Wiccan author Starhawk, founder of the Covenant of the Goddess. All it takes is "four basic abilities: relaxation, concentration, visualization, and projection."[8] The last step means projecting energy by moving one's mental images with the human will and imagination.

That's what Bakugan's anime fans learn to do: concentrate, visualize, and then project the power through their beast-filled balls or playing cards. Starhawk described it well in her book on witchcraft: "To cast a spell is to project energy though a symbol."[8]

If spellcasting is so easy, and you can learn it through a card game, why aren't we all flying and rolling around in big piles of cash? I think the real problem here is somebody can't separate fantasy from reality, and it's not the children I'm talking about.