Secretaries and Other People Who Answer the Phone

I'm going to share with you my pet peeves about the way people abuse secretaries and other people who answer the phone (staffers, customer service representatives, receptionists, etc.)

First and foremost, I have no control over what my boss does, doesn't do, says, doesn't say, where he goes, or what phone calls, letters or other communications he responds to or ignores. None. Yes, he got your message/letter/fax/email. If he chose not to respond to it, yelling at me isn't going to change anything. If he responded in a way that you don't like, I can't do anything about it. Stop yelling at me. I just work here.

I talk to dozens of people every day. I do not recognize all of their voices. I don't know what your relationship is like with my boss. So stop getting pissy when I don't recognize your voice or know that you go golfing with my boss twice a week. When you're golfing, I'm here answering phones.

My boss does not have your number memorized. I do not have your number memorized. I take down dozens of numbers every day. If you want a call back, just give me the damn number.

Making the same request in different words doesn't change the answer. I don't keep my boss' calendar. If you want to make an appointment, you'll have to talk to him. Asking me if I "think" he "might" be available at a certain date and time won't magically give me knowledge of his calendar.

If I tell you that my boss is on the phone, not at his desk, or not in the building, you can't talk to him. Either what I said to you is true, or it's what he told me to tell you, but either way, he's not talking to you. At that point, it's not helpful to say things like, "but I was just talking to him". Well, you're not now.

Yes, I do know my boss' cell phone number, but if I give it to you, I will be fired. You will need a gun, some barbed wire and a mesh cage filled with tarantulas to get it out of me.



Just as a reminder, secretaries and other people who answer the phone work very hard for relatively little money. Abusing them is like kicking puppies or punching babies- they can't fight back, they just have to sit there and take it. So stop it.