Heads I Win, Tails You Lose

At 6:01 on Saturday, May 21, my husband turned to me and said, "Well, we'll be seeing a lot of new atheists soon."

He's wrong. He's not totally wrong. I think the children of those who believed Camping and watched their parents lose everything to a rapture that never happened may end up questioning their faith, but the adults? No. For one thing, they're too invested in their belief. Once you've sold your home, quit your job and put down your dog for your beliefs, you're not backing down. For another, the Bible provides the perfect out for these people: Deuteronomy 18:20-22.

“But if any prophet presumes to speak anything in my name that I have not authorized him to speak, or speaks in the name of other gods, that prophet must die. 18:21 Now if you say to yourselves, ‘How can we tell that a message is not from the Lord?’ – 18:22 whenever a prophet speaks in my name and the prediction is not fulfilled, then I have not spoken it; the prophet has presumed to speak it, so you need not fear him.”

So, let me get this straight, predictions that do come true are from Yhwh, predictions that do not come true are not from Yhwh. Heads, I win, tails, you lose.

It's almost like the writer of Deuteronomy knew these sorts of things would happen- over and over again. Funny, that.

So don't expect that Camping's devotees will lose their faith along with their homes and jobs. They might, might mind you, stop listening to Camping, but their belief in god will remain unaffected.

5=Atonement, 10=Completeness, 17=Heaven

I'm sure you've heard that the world is going to end on May 21- five days after my husband's birthday. We've decided to sell the house and everything in it and celebrate his birthday in Vegas. Put it all on black, baby, it's all gonna burn anyway! Whoooo!

This is how Harold Camping came up with that date:

“The number 5, Camping concluded, equals "atonement." Ten is "completeness." Seventeen means "heaven." Camping patiently explained how he reached his conclusion for May 21, 2011.

How he came up with that is not explained. I've always thought 27 would be completeness. (It's 3^3!)

"Christ hung on the cross April 1, 33 A.D.," he began. "Now go to April 1 of 2011 A.D., and that's 1,978 years."

Here's the thing, well, things. First of all, given what's said in the Bible about Jesus' birth, including the mention of Herod, Jesus had to have been born prior to 4BCE, because we do know that Herod died in that year. (The Romans kept great records.) So, if Jesus died 33 years later, it could not have been after 29CE.

Also, there's the problem with calendars. Geds could give a better explanation, I'm sure, but we have not been using the Gregorian calendar straight from year zero. It was put into effect in 1582. Other calendars were used between year zero and 1582, and it looks like those calendars didn't handle the leap year issue very well. That makes it a bit difficult to pinpoint exact dates 2,000 years ago as Camping has.

Camping then multiplied 1,978 by 365.2422 days - the number of days in each solar year, not to be confused with a calendar year.

Next, Camping noted that April 1 to May 21 encompasses 51 days. Add 51 to the sum of previous multiplication total, and it equals 722,500.

Camping realized that (5 x 10 x 17) x (5 x 10 x 17) = 722,500.

Apparently, Camping thought 10 is a prime number, which it is not. He dropped the bit about 722,500 being composed of two sets of prime numbers (as explained at the Refute Camping website), so now he's saying that 722,500 is, well,

Or put into words: (Atonement x Completeness x Heaven), squared.

Well, it's squared. That makes it true.

"Five times 10 times 17 is telling you a story," Camping said. "It's the story from the time Christ made payment for your sins until you're completely saved.

"I tell ya, I just about fell off my chair when I realized that," Camping said.

Yeah, maybe we shouldn't burn the house down and run to Vegas.

Also, this isn't the first time Camping has predicted the end of the world.

On Sept. 6, 1994, dozens of Camping's followers gathered around the country to await the return of Christ, an event Camping had been promising for two years. His followers dressed in their Sunday best and held Bibles open-faced toward heaven. Of course, the world did not end that day.

That's really sad. Really stupid, but really sad. And now a whole new group of people will be sitting around in the Sunday best waiting for nothing.