Girl Genius Discussion Friday - 4-8

(reposted for noobs) From now on, Friday morning will be Girl Genius discussion day here in Hell. Girl Genius updates Monday, Wednesday and Friday, so we can discuss the preceding week, and Girl Genius in general, on Friday.

This week we learned that Vanamonde von Mekkan can grow a full beard in a hurry, Doom Bell Ringer is the most important job in the world and Oublenmach has no idea what's going on. Seriously, ringing the Doom Bell will flood Mechanicsburg with Jägermonsters. That would be great for Agatha and fun for the Jägers, but how does that benefit Oublenmach?

4ö4 Error: Hat Not Found

You know what you've been missing out on? Browsing the internet in Jägerspeak! Seriously, in case you're wondering how I've been maintaining my sanity lately, I've been reading everything as if it were written by Jägers- not that they're at all bigoted, sexist or religious.Convinced of their own superiority, sure, but I would be, too, were I nearly immortal, improbably strong and possessing elegantly pointed ears. Still, Focus on the Family's dreck rendered in a stereotypical bad German accent is amusing rather than enraging.

Hilariously, if you attempt to view a page that won't load, this is the error message you get:

Zis page must uf lozt itz het.

Ah, the wisdom of Jägers.

The Weirdest Thing Happened to Me Today

I walked down to the drug store to use a coupon that expires tomorrow and was approached by two young men, one blond, one with a shaved head, attempting to hand out religious tracts and bottled water by saying, "Want a free bottle of water?"

(a) I'm not taking food or beverage from some random guy on the street and (b) no, I don't want your religious literature, please throw away your own trash.

So I said, "No, thank you," and kept walking.

Blond guy starts to implore me some more, Shaved Head grabs his arm and says, "Forget it, she's a witch."

O_o

So, totally forgetting that I have a Jägermonster sigil on my sleeve (see my profile picture), and not realizing what that would probably look like to the religiously sheltered, I assume he is saying "bitch" without actually saying it, and I stop and say, "Just because you replace the 'b' with a 'w' does not make that an acceptable thing to say about a woman!"

That's right, I caused a scene. I could actually hear my mother desperately hissing don't cause a scene! Too late, mom.

Religious dudes back away from me, almost into traffic, and Shaved Head's all, "I didn't- I didn't"

"How dare you call me a bitch?!"

Now people are stopping to watch. Due to the close proximity of the county courthouse, the federal courthouse and the university, the crowd includes lawyers in suits, defendants in suits and college students.

"No, no a witch!"

"What?!"

"You've got a demon on your arm!"

At this point, I'm pretty sure I've confronted a paranoid schizophrenic and I'm starting to feel bad about it, until a woman in a suit standing next to me taps the pin and says, "I think he means this."

"Oh, the Jägermonster sigil. It's from a-"

"I LOVE GIRL GENIUS!" shout two girls with blue hair and pink hair and tattoos and piercings- college students.

That's right, I found two people who love Girl Genius by starting a scene with a religious nutter. And, despite the fact that I am twice their age and do not have blue or pink hair, they think I am the coolest person evah for wearing the pin everywhere. In fact, I am officially "subversive".

Religious dudes still have no idea what just happened.