Wednesday, June 8, 2011

Fuck You, Glamor!



For some reason I cannot identify, I have an unending subscription to Glamor that I never have to pay for. It's very odd.

Anyway, Glamor might make me crazier than Cosmo, in that Glamor likes to position themselves as the urfeminist fashion magazine. You read that right. Urfeminist fashion magazine. It's obnoxious. It is simply hateful to see "You're all right just the way you are" articles interspersed with this crap (gee, I wish I could move pictures around while editing blogger in Firefox):

1. See the first picture? This is in answer to a question about going grey at 28. (Welcome to the club, people.) If you don't feel like clicking on it to enlarge, the caption says that models were deliberately greyed at a fashion show. Is that hair grey? No, it fucking isn't. That hair is not grey, not at all. If you're going to tell me grey is the new blonde, accompany it with a picture of actual grey hair.

2. See the second picture? Those two models represent (top) a "leggy" body type and (bottom) a "plus size" body type. Can you tell a difference? Because I can't. Neither one of those women is plus sized. In fact, given that the average size for American women is a size 12, that "plus size" woman isn't even close to average, let alone plus average. In fact, that's what I look like naked.

I AM A SIZE 2.

I cannot shop in department stores, their smallest size is a 6. I buy a lot of my clothes in the junior's section.

I AM UNDERWEIGHT. IT IS NOT HEALTHY. Stomach bugs put me in the hospital because my body has nothing to fall back on when I can't eat. I am cold 8 months of the year. My kitchen chairs have cushions rather than hard seats because I don't have natural cushioning to sit on, so if I sit on a hard chair for any period of time, I cut off the nerves in my rear and my legs go numb. Do you know how much well cushioned dining room chairs cost? I do.

That "plus size" model looks exactly like the underweight, size 2 wearing woman on the other end of your computer screen.

Feeling bad about yourself? Don't. You couldn't possibly have any idea what healthy or average or normal even looks like because of this shit. You couldn't even get close. And Glamor is at least part of the reason why.

Fuck you, Glamor!

4 comments:

  1. "For some reason I cannot identify, I have an unending subscription to Glamor that I never have to pay for." So that's why the blog is named Forever in Hell.

    ReplyDelete
  2. now come on over here and clean off my iPod.

    ReplyDelete
  3. Andy - thanks for that laugh!



    i modeled a bit as a teen [often was rejected because my boobs were too big] when i was a size 12, someone tried to get me to be a "plus size" model, and didn't UNDERSTAND why i was insulted by that.

    i was underweight when i *did* model. i looked GOOD at a size 12. at my lowest weight, 123 pounds, i wore a size 6 [I HAVE HIPS!!!] but i think the size 6 in 1993 would be a size *2* today - they've changed the sizes. because as a size 6 back then, i was fitting into size 12 KIDS clothing - and a size 6 today is bigger than that.

    but the jump from 14 to 16 - they did NOT change the bigger sizes. i know people who are 2 sizes too small for a 16, but too big for a 14 - which shouldn't be possible, 2 sizes smaller than a 16 SHOULD be a 12 [or, i guess, a 15/16 should be an 11/12 - WHY do we have sizes like that? sigh] and yet, there it is - there are people trapped between 14s and 16s, because FASHION IS FUCKING STUPID!!!!!!!!!1

    sigh

    ReplyDelete
  4. What Denelian said about Fashion.

    And Andy is a riot. :)

    ReplyDelete

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Forever in Hell by Personal Failure is licensed under a Creative Commons Attribution-NoDerivs 3.0 Unported License.
Based on a work at foreverinhell.blogspot.com.