The Obvious End Result

If you've never heard of 7xsunday, it's a website that makes Rapture Ready look mainstream. It's message boards are populated primarily by people raised in the Quiverfull lifestyle, people who were homeschooled, attended home churches, whose every waking moment was controlled by their parents. People who accept as being perfectly normal extreme notions of modesty, courtship rather than dating and marrying a person without ever having held their hand. Yeah.

It's a busy site, because there are lots of them. Oh, and the abstinence only crowd is only a half step removed from them, so don't think this isn't relevant.

We talk a lot about modesty here in Hell, so I thought I'd show you the natural result of being raised with such beliefs:

Its got to do with love making. I hope i dont offend anyone by being blunt but id rather get to the point rather than not stating properly what i have on my mind. Ill start at the beginning. During my teen years i started to develop strong attractions for the opposite sex and my mom told me thats normal and taught me on saving myself for the man God had for me.

I am not going to mock her use of English. It's painful to me, but she was homeschooled for the purposes of pushing out as many babies as she can while keeping the house clean and her husband fed, nothing more. It's not her fault.

I found this very hard as i felt myself getting 'turned on' easily if i saw a handsome man that i fancied or got very aroused if a boy i liked touched my hand - eek i said it- However i kept pure and trained my thoughts with the Holy Spirits help to be pure and not think those things even though i struggled many times. Fast forward a few years, i got married young but by that point my struggle to not think impure thoughts about men had vanished. I thought oh when i get married i can finally think of my husband in that way.

You know where this is going, right?

Well, the strange thing is, i feel nothing. I mean i am very much attracted to and in love with my husband but -embrassed to say this- i feel NOTHING physically during love making. This was a shock to me because i was so easily turned on before. I no my hormones were crazy then because of puberty but still. I read a book 'The act of marriage' before getting married which explained how women get aroused etc but i dont no whats wrong with me. Im not on any medication, pills, my diet is good, no health problem because i checked that out already. I have only been married for a year but i can tell things are not looking good for us. I am extremely sad because we have such an amazing relationship and im trying to be the best helpmeet i can for my dear husband except for this one vital area. When it comes to love making i dont feel any pleasure, its not painful or anything and i can do the act just feel no pleasure. Its frustrating me so much because i cant O.... and my DH because he feels its one sided. Is this normal or what? Everyone told me once im allowed to have sex, it will be amazing and id be doing it non stop but to be honest i feel that i can easily live without sex since i feel nothing. Urgh i am so sad

Oh, honey. You trained yourself, no doubt with great effort and difficulty, to never think a sexual thing about another person and now you're surprised that you can't? *sigh* Of course you can't think sexual thoughts. The mind gets very good at whatever it practices. If you practiced adding large numbers in your head, you'd get good at that, too. Unfortunately, you practiced turning your brain into a Ken doll.

See, you can't turn off your sexy thoughts and then assume you can just turn them back on when you want to. And, there's the fact that the only reason you would turn off your sexy thoughts is because you were led to believe they were bad. It's ridiculous that people told her that as soon as she was married, she'd just love sex and be thinking sexy thoughts nonstop and having neighbor-scaring, bed-shattering fuckfests 24/7.

I think there is another issue at work here, as well. There is such a thing as chemistry. See, I never restrained my sexy thoughts. I also wore miniskirts and dated and had- gasp- premarital sex. It didn't take me long to learn that my body likes some people and doesn't like others, and it's not always related to how my brain feels about those people. I can like a man, find him intelligent and funny, find being around him an absolute joy and feel not an iota of sexual interest in him. I can also find a man to be an arrogant prick and my body is raring to go. If your relationship is going to include sex (I'm not saying relationships have to, asexual people need love, too), you need to be in a relationship with someone you are physically attracted to.

Unfortunately, this poor woman turned off her sexual attraction, so she would have no way of knowing whether or not she was attracted to her husband. Maybe she isn't. If she's not, not matter how hard she tries, she's never going to be into sex with him.

This is, btw, why I'm terribly leery of expecting teenagers to simply turn off their sexual urges instead of teaching them about safer sex. Evidence says that most of them can't turn off their sexual urges, and now we can see the price of actually doing so. Poor woman.

My Empire Will More Shocking for Some than Others

When I am Empress of the Entire Freakin' World, not only will you find yourself wearing purple and berets, and possibly purple berets (if you are lucky), I will extend comprehensive sex education to everyone. Five-year-olds, fifty-year-olds, nuns, dogs, absolutely everyone will be getting comprehensive sex education. We'll be shutting down all work in the entire freakin' world to have a week long discussion about consent. We'll spend at least one week on the clitoris, one week on fetishes, and at least a few days on appropriate lubricants. No one, in the entire freakin' world, will get to take a lunch break until everyone can say aloud, without blushing, "penis" and "vagina" (or whatever it is in their native language. we don't discriminate in the Empire.)

Apparently, some people are going to have more trouble with this than others, as evidenced by what some people consider, andiquote, disturbing.

Here are some of the more disturbing pieces of the [proposed Montana curriculum].

• Introduce basic reproductive body parts (penis, vagina, breast, nipples, testicles, scrotum, uterus) -- Kindergarten and Grades 1-3

What is disturbing about kindergarteners correctly identifying parts of the body by their proper names? Does this person have an issue with children saying "spleen"? It's a body part, get the fuck over it.

• Acknowledge that individuals & families have a variety of values as it pertains to sexual behaviors -- Grade 2

Reality, here it is. Acknowledging that something exists in reality is disturbing? Is it also disturbing to introduce children to the idea that some people speak a different language than they do?

• Recognize that there are a variety of reasons why people may end a committed relationship -- Grade 3

50% of marriages end in divorce. We may want to talk to children about it. Just a thought.

• Acknowledge that gay men, lesbians, bisexuals, and heterosexuals can establish lifelong
  committed relationships -- Grade 8

Again, acnowledging reality. Plus, eighth graders are 13-14 years old. I think they can handle the idea. About things that exist in reality. Really real reality.

• Understand that marriage is considered a commitment by two people to love, help,
  and support one another -- Grade 6

What definition of marriage is this guy using that the above sentence is "disturbing"? Do we know if his wife's been seen recently?

• Emphasize that no one has the right to impose their values
  on others -- Grade 6

Amen!

• Understand human beings can love people of the same gender & people of another gender -- Grade 1

Again, actual things that happen in actual really real reality. Is there some other way I can say this that would make it more clear? Do I need more adverbs? I like adverbs.

• Understand making fun of people by calling them gay (e.g., “homo,” “fag,” “queer”) is
  disrespectful & hurtful -- Grade 2

BECAUSE IT IS. why is that disturbing? seriously, it's disturbing to suggest that yelling "fag!" at someone might hurt their feelings?

• Understand that sexual intercourse includes but is not limited to vaginal, oral, or anal
  penetration -- Grade 5

Considering that someone told me once it wasn't sex if they didn't cum, I'm voting on the side of necessary for this one. (Don't ask.)

• Understand sexual orientation refers to a person’s physical and/or romantic attraction to an individual of the same and/or different gender, and is one
  part of ones’ personality -- Grades 5 and 6

What else does sexual orientation refer to?

• Understand that sexual intercourse ncludes but is not imited to vaginal, oral, or anal penetration; using the penis, fingers, tongue or objects -- Grades 6-12

Apparently, he was really disturbed by this one. it's listed twice. oh, wait, i see, "objects" are added in the later years. Meh.

• Understand teenagers who decide to engage in sexual behavior must also decide about
  pregnancy & STI/HIV prevention -- Grade 6

DUH.

• Understand barrier methods of contraception (e.g. male and female condoms, dental dams can greatly reduce but not prevent STIs) -- Grades 5-12

Is the teen birth rate under abstinence only not enough for you?

Apparently, being asked to experience actually actual really real reality is just too much for some people. And they want to educate your children.

Utah's Dirty Little Secret

Utah, land of the Mormons, who value virginity only slightly less than your average fundamentalist muslim, has a dirty little secret:

[Missy Bird of the Utah Planned Parenthood Action Council] said of the 123
Planned Parenthood Action Council affiliates around the country, the Utah
affiliate has the highest number of young women seeking emergency anti-pregnancy
treatments, known as the "morning after" pill.

That's odd. I wonder what else is going on in the most conservative, religious place in America (other than Amish enclaves)? A place that, btw, teaches abstinence exclusively.

Pregnancy rates among girls younger than 15 doubled between 2002 to 2007 in
that [Utah County], while the rate remained stable in the rest of the state,
according to the Utah Department of Health.

Statewide, chlamydia rates rose 150 percent and gonorrhea rates rose
122 percent between 1997 and 2007, according to the Utah Department of Health.

The majority of new cases of chlamydia (57 percent) were found in those
ages 15-24 and 30 percent of those were under the age of 19.

What do leaders in Utah have to say about this?

The head-in-the-sand approach that actually is harming the very children
they are trying to protect can be seen in a statement Utah Eagle Forum President
Gayle Ruzicka gave to The Tribune in its story about the poll.

"When you teach them about sex, that just encourages sexual activity," she said.

That would be hilarious if it weren't for all the unwanted pregnancies and disease.

I Regret a Lot, But Not the Sex

safe sex, candies, abstinence,

I have regrets. You can't get to age 5 without regrets. You know what I don't regret? Being powerful, active and involved in my own sexuality and sex life.

I didn't "give away" my virginity, I enjoyed the first time I had sex. Sure, it was akward and painful at first, and exciting and fun. I've said no to a few people in my time, and I've never "given in" to anyone's demands to have sex, either. I've never had sex in order to be loved or keep a man. I have had sex because I wanted to. I've had sex with a man I had no intentions of ever seeing again. I've used condoms and been tested for AIDS*.

My point is that it's my body, my life and my choice. Every choice I've made, I made, and I've owned it. I've owned the good and the bad, and let me tell you, if you want to be satisfied with yourself as a person, if you want to like yourself, owning your decisions is crucial. If you want to stop being the victim of your own life, you have to make our own damn choices.

So it really pisses me off to see girls exposed to this kind of crap from the candie's foundation.

Facts:

91: The percentage of teens who think it's important to get a strong message that they should wait to have sex.

76: The percentage of teens who wish the media showed the consequences of sex more.

75: The percentage of teens who don't thinks it's embarrassing to admit to being a virgin.

60: The percentage of teens who wish they'd waited longer to have sex.

First of all, I can't figure out where these "facts" come from. Have these teens never seen the Lifetime Channel? How about Bristol Palin? Who doesn't know the consequences of . . . oh, right, people who haven't had sex ed. Okay, then, what does candies have for teens to help them be strong, independent owners of their own existence?

A tank top with a slogan across the breasts, involving the word "sexy" in bright pink. That sound? That's my forehead repeatedly slamming into my desk.

Here's the advice I give all the girls in my family. If you're not sure you should be having sex, you shouldn't be. And that applies equally the first and the millionth time you have sex. If you're too embarrassed to buy condoms, you're not ready to have sex. If you can't deal with the possible consequences of sex, i.e., an unplanned pregnancy or an abortion, you're not ready to have sex, and that applies to 16 year olds and 40 year olds alike.

It's your body, own it.

*Actually, having had a blood transfusion prior to 1979, I've had lots of AIDS tests. Like 15 of them. Oh, and at least that many Hep C tests.

Spiritual Care?

religion, christian, health care, hatch, enzi, kerry, public option, rape, birth control, abortion, abstinence, safe sex,
The Secular Coalition for America is fighting three amendments to the health care bill that are egregious examples of religious intrusion in government that we all should be aware of and fight against.

Of great concern is a bipartisan amendment sponsored by Senators Orrin Hatch (R-Utah) and John Kerry (D-Mass.) that would require private and public health plans to cover all "spiritual care" - whether or not the individual has religous objections to medical care. This proposed funding undermines our Constitution and will open up your tax dollars to scam artists.

This amendment will make an existing problem worse. Religious people who object to medical care already have some "spiritual care" covered by Medicare and Medicaid. This "spiritual care" includes reimbursements for payments that Christian Scientists make to members of the Church who pray for them when they are ill. Numerous children have died while receiving this "spiritual care" when modern science would easily have saved their lives. And you helped pay!

We currently pay people to watch children die. Allow me to repeat myself: your tax dollars pay people to watch children die. This is appalling and should not be allowed to continue. The fact that the government doles out tax dollars for this reprehensible practice is . . . I don't know what to say. I don't have words for that.

One Christian Scientist congregation presided over the deaths of 64 children between 1975 and 1995, and Orrin Hatch and John Kerry want to encourage that. I suggest contacting them and telling them no.

Senator Enzi wants to make sure that if my doctor is opposed to birth control pills or, well, anything, he doesn't even have to tell me the treatment exists. This is already a problem with morning after pills, especially for rape victims. Rape victims who visit Christian (usually Catholic) hospitals, or who are seen by those opposed to birth control, are often not even told that after the fact birth control exists. I am personally quite opposed to exposing already traumatized rape victims to the further trauma of having to choose between giving birth to their rapist's baby or aborting it.

We are fighting another amendment, proposed by Senator Mike Enzi (R-Wyoming), which would ensure that doctors can deny patients any care or information that violates the doctor's religious beliefs. This violation of medical ethics is labeled with the Orwellian term "Conscience Clause" - i.e. denying or delaying proper care for a person in need. This amendment cruelly places the religious beliefs of practitioners (such as pharmacists) above the medical needs of patients. This amendment threatens your access to contraception, end-of-life care, HIV care, and any other care to which a health provider employee objects.

Senator Hatch also wants to revive abstinence-only programs, despite the fact that they are a miserable failure.

Third, Senator Hatch has submitted an amendment requesting that funding for Title V abstinence-only-until-marriage programs be restored. Congress has wasted $ 1.5 billion on such programs since 1996. Numerous studies, including a 10-year government-funded evaluation of the Title V abstinence-only program, have found that these programs do not delay sexual initiation and have no beneficial impact on young people's health or sexual behavior. In addition to being ineffective and leaving out information on safe sex, many such programs contain false and misleading "medical" statements and teach religious propaganda and theologically-driven gender stereotypes to our children.

There is no reason to teach abstinence only other than religion. Abstinence-only programs don't work, as is ably demonstrated by the fact that teens in highly religious states have the highest pregnancy rates. Abstinence-only programs deter birth control use, not sex.

Please help out teenagers, women, rape victims, children, yourself, and everyone else and tell these politicians, in no uncertain terms, to keep their religion out of the health care bill.

A Christian Comic: Final Fantasy Meets Rock Band

comic, christian, safe sex, homosexual, music

The Truth for Youth produces Christian comics of such awesome hilarity that I think the author/artist should get some sort of award. Seriously, look at that picture from "Wasted Words: The Truth About Secular Music". Clearly, the designers of Final Fantasy have gotten together with the designers of Rock Band and this was the result. The lyrics were obviously taken from a rejected song written by the Maynard of Tool after a week long ecstasy binge, and someone's been spending a little too much time with the lolcatz (KEWL!*).

The comic only gets better from there with such classic lines as "I should have listened in bible study!" and "Maybe I'm [at the show] to learn deeper truths".

Born That Way: The Truth About Homosexuality has the standard "gays don't deserve civil rights, it's a choice, blahblahblah", set the exciting atmosphere of a riot- complete with tear gas and flying boulders.

Passes and Plays: The Truth About Safe Sex includes the high school football star, the slutty cheerleader, lies about STDs and birth control, and the instant classic line: "Baby, we'll be doin' more than talkin' later! I'm gonna huddle on your line of scrimmage and go for the extra point! Haw Haw**!"

Fail so awesome it's a win.

*Seriously, who speaks lolcat?

**It appears that Christian comics are required to include that laugh.