Rank Cruelty

He is laughing at your pain.

I worked for about a year in Morristown, NJ. They have a seeing eye dog training facility* in Morristown (or they used to), so I saw a lot of people training seeing eye dogs and a lot people being trained in using a seeing eye dog.

I was sitting on a bench in the park in the center of town during lunch, enjoying a truly spectacular spring day, when I woman with a seeing eye dog stopped in front of me. The trainer ran up to her (they would follow behind a little once the person was a little more familiar with the dog) and asked her what was wrong and she told him she was a little overwhelmed, just let her rest for a minute. I later learned that she was fairly new to being blind and hadn't gotten her confidence back about being out in the world.

Anyway, a woman walks up to her and starts petting the dog (do NOT pet the service dog) and babbling on about her uncle who was blind and never left the house and what a burden he was on the family and how nice that this woman was brave and outside. Yeah, srsly.

She left, and I said, "I'd much rather be blind than be that stupid," and the woman laughed. We chatted for a while and then she had to get back to learning to use a seeing eye dog and I had to get back to work. I really hope everything worked out for her.

I think of this woman, in our society today, when we don't abandon the blind or assume sinfulness led to their condition, when they have programs to read the internet to them, books on tapes and seeing eye dogs, being so nervous about the world when I read this:

"In regard to the man born blind (John 9), the question was asked of Jesus, “Who’s sin was it, this man’s or his parents’, that he was afflicted with blindness?” Jesus said it was neither. In other words, the question was a false dilemma. And those who asked it were trying to reduce to two options something that had more than two. There was another option. Jesus said, “It wasn’t because of his sin or his parents’ sin. This person was born blind so that the power of God and the grace of God may be made manifest.” That person was suffering not from persecution. His suffering was used by God to bring honor and glory to Christ.

I mention this instance because it is a clear biblical case in which suffering has theological value – not merit, but value – insofar that it is useful to the purposes of God.

That is so cruel. There is no glory there, only the sort of rank cruelty that is the privilege of the able. Only a person who has never suffered so could say something like that.

Think of this man, 2,000 years ago, born blind. Think of his life. There were no accommodations, no Americans with Disabilities Act, no organizations to help the disabled, no seeing eye dogs or canes. He was pretty much at the mercy of his family and a primitive, superstitious world. A primitive, superstitious world that viewed his disability as clear evidence of sin.

Imagine that you had the power to set things on fire with your mind. Imagine further that you proved it by setting a complete stranger on fire. And then, as they screamed in agony, you said, "Hey, this is all to make me look good, stop complaining." According to Jesus, that's exactly what he did.

That isn't glory, that is cruelty on a breathtaking scale. And these people celebrate it.

*At first I assumed there was some sort of wide scale industrial accident leading to a much higher than normal incidence of blindness, but I never go for the obvious answer first.

Blasphemy, I'm Committing It

Rule 34

Since it's the Easter today, I have been seeing for weeks posts about the great sacrifice of Jesus. He died for our sins, you see. He suffered for all mankind. We fucking owe him! (I'm condensing a bit.)

So I'm going to commit the same blasphemy I did at the age of 6 and ask, "What sacrifice? He was god. That can hardly be considered sacrifice from god."*

To condense the entire Jesus story into a single paragraph:

God makes man. God makes a tree that contains all truth and puts it, unwatched, right out in the open, five feet away from man. Unsurprisingly to everyone but God, man eats the fruit of the tree. Man is now sinful, and now all his descendants are sinful. Yes, the descendants didn't do a thing, but Hell for them, too. God lets this go for a few thousand years and then decides to go to Earth as a human to fix this by being tortured and killed. How this fixes anything or why this was the best method of fixing things or why God waited a few thousand years to fix things is never explained.

Now get on your knees and pray!

None of that makes sense. But what really doesn't make sense is how God as a man briefly suffering and then dying- how surprised was Satan to see God in Hell for a few days?- is a sacrifice at all. Jesus suffered for what, a few days? God is eternal, mind you. God's been around, unchanged since ever. What's three days in comparison to ever? Nothing, nothing at all.

I've been sick for about a decade now. That's 3,650 days. I've been suffering for 3,647 days more than Jesus suffered, ignoring leap years. So why isn't everyone worshipping me? I mean, 3 days? Fuck off! Don't you dare fucking whinge to me about 3 days of suffering. Seriously, fuck you.

If someone told me that I could, today, be whipped, have a crown of thorns shoved into my skull and then be nailed to a cross to hang there for 12 hours or so and then I would never be in pain again, my body would be healthy and without any disease of any kind, I would kiss their feet for offering me such an opportunity. I would buy the cat o' nine tails myself, build my own cross and nail my own feet to it. (I can't believe denelian wouldn't do so as well.) Don't act like that's a sacrifice, people.

And, I'm human. I'm not God. God is omnipresent, which means, practically speaking, that only a tiny portion of God was being human, since not all of God could fit in a human body. So only the tiniest portion of God suffered anything at all. That makes anyone going on about Jesus' suffering like someone with a hangnail telling me their agony is so much worse than what I've been enduring for ten fucking years.

Yeah, you know what? You come back and tell me about the Jesus story when he's suffering a tenth as much as me. Then we'll talk.

Feel free to hand me a bag of Cadbury MiniEggs in the meantime, though.

*I probably did not use those exact words.

Oh, C'mon Now, Who Are You Trying to Fool?

You wanna mess up your kids? Tell them every stray thought will land them in hell and then show them the works of Heironymous Bosch.

Sin.

Once upon a time, sin was a big deal to me. I was convinced, utterly convinced, that every little sin was sending me to Hell. I absolutely, sincerely convinced that Satan watched everyone at all times and listened to our thoughts and that any stray thought or negative emotion of any kind- no matter how fleeting- could land me in Hell. Immediately.

I was nine.

Yes, my childhood was a happy one. Ever try not thinking about Satan? Good luck with that.

Ever try not feeling angry about anything ever? Better luck with that one.

Keep in mind, that's not unusual Christian theology. Plenty of Christians belief that even feeling slightly angry at someone else is the same as murder. (coughRayComfortcough) Even more feel that finding a woman vaguely attractive is exactly the same as a gangbang with five hermaphrodite hookers, a goat and a pineapple- and it's all the woman's fault, btw.

Now, I know this guy comes from the Ray Comfort school of "ever been angry? enjoy hell, sucka!" school of theology, which is why I find this post a little bit . . . disingenuous.

The following comes from page 1951 in the John MacMarthur Bible Commentary and addresses the fact that born again believers do not habitually sin.

Why Christians Won't Habitually Sin

This passage begins with the phrase "Whoever commits sin" (v. 4). Commits translates a Greek verb that conveys the idea of habitual practice. Although genuine Christians have a sin nature (1 John 1:8) and do behave sinfully, their confession of sin (1 John 1:9; 2:1) and acceptance of forgiveness prevent sin from becoming the unbroken pattern of their lives (John 8:31, 34-36;Romans 6:11; 2 John 1:9). God builds a certain growing awareness about sin that provides four effective reasons why true Christians cannot habitually practice sin:

1. Genuine Christians cannot practice sin because sin is incompatible with the law of God, which they love (1 John 3:4; Psalm 119:34, 77, 97; Romans 7:12, 22); whereas habitual sin betrays the ultimate sense of rebellion - living as if there were no law or ignoring what laws exist (James 4:17) - in short, lawlessness.

2. Genuine Christians cannot practice sin because sin is incompatible with the work of Christ (1 John 3:5). Christ died to sanctify (make holy) the believer (2 Corinthians 5:21;Ephesians 5:25-27). Habitual sin contradicts Christ's work of breaking the dominion of sin in the believer's life (Romans 6:1-15).

3. Genuine Christians cannot practice sin because Christ came to destroy the works of the arch-sinner, Satan (1 John 3:8). The devil is still operating, but he has been defeated, and in Christ we escape his tyranny. The day will come when all of Satan's activity will cease in the universe, and he will be sent to hell forever (Revelation 20:10).

4. Genuine Christians cannot practice sin because sin is incompatible with the ministry of the Holy Spirit, who has imparted a new nature to the believer (1 John 3:9; John 3:5-8). This new nature shuns sin and exhibits the habitual character of righteousness produced by the Holy Spirit (Galatians 5:22-24).

So, who sins? Everyone. Who doesn't lie, who doesn't get angry, who doesn't feel lustful? Surely some of the people who claim to be Christians must actually be Christians, and I've never noticed a difference in behavior between Christians and nonChristians, have you? Christians have a higher divorce rate, there are more Christians in prison and the more religious a country is, the more crime it has. Christians sin, just like the rest of us.

What this is, really, is a No True Scotsman and a Guilt Complex. This allows you to say, "But they're not really Christians" any time I point to a clearly sinning Christian, "real Christians don't sin!" Sure. Unless conversion is actually being replaced with a pod person, yes, Christians sin like the rest of us.

[Note: before you go all apeshit in the comments section, follow the link, see why that is a logical fallacy and not acceptable in argumentation and DON'T USE IT.]

The Guilt Complex of this is a little more subtle. It explains the constant rerererererededicating their lives to Jesus that so many Christians engage in. You'd think once or twice or three times would be enough, but no, they're dedicating their lives to Jesus on a weekly basis. How many times does it take, really? 58,000 apparently. I can tell you what the internal struggle is, because I've lived it.

Christian: Oh, not again!

Atheist: What?

Christian: I keep sinning. I'm not really a Christian!

Atheist: You believe in Jesus, right? You accept him as your Lord and Savior, right? Sure you're Christian. Fairly obnoxious about it, actually.

Christian: No, no, no! I can't be a Christian, I keep sinning!

Atheist: Sinning how?

Christian: I keep finding women other than my wife attractive!

Atheist: Srsly?

Christian: How did you say that without vowels? Never mind, yes, it's sinning! It's adultery!

Atheist: Dude, finding an attractive woman attractive is no big deal. You're not fucking them, are you?

Christian: NO!

Atheist: Yeah, you'll be fine.

Christian: No, I won't be fine. I need to become a Christian, or I'll burn forever in hell when I die! I could die at any moment! Please, God, save me!

Atheist: Um, yeah, well, call me when you're done with that.

These poor people, they're absolutely tormented. Tormented by assholes who tell them, over and over again, that being human is proof of their worthiness for eternal torment. It's sick.

Ruling with a Rod of Iron

I realized, reading this, that a lot of people in this country screaming about fascism aren't actually opposed to fascism, they just want a very specific fascist state- one led by Jesus and his rod o' iron*.

Ruling with a rod of iron. I can't wait!

Revelation 12:5 (King James Version)

"And she brought forth a man child, who was to rule all nations with a rod of iron: and her child was caught up unto God, and to his throne."

When you think about all the nations today, can you think of ONE nation that doesn't need to be "ruled with a rod of iron"? Including the U.S.? I can't. We have lost our way more than ever before.

Funny, I can't think of any countries that would benefit from theocracy/fascism/autocracy. It's really sad when Tunisians and Egyptians and Libyans are teaching Americans lessons in freedom and democracy. That was supposed to be our thing. We were so proud of it.

Come quickly Lord Jesus. I long for your rightous rule over this planet. I long for the day when the word "politician" and "dear leader" are no longer in our vocabulary. The meek shall inherit the earth and rightly so.

These people use the oddest definition of "meek" I've ever seen.

We need you Jesus. We have proven for thousands of years that without you, we are nothing but filthy rags; meaningless and good for nothing.

Speak for yourself. I am neither a filthy rag, nor meaningless, nor good for nothing. Honestly, say that sort of thing in any other context and people will be shipping you off to a therapist.

I agree with you on this one!

There'll be no more need for a press secretary, Cabinet meetings. The word "consensus" no longer needed. No more compromises made. No more presidential scandals. No criticisms directed against our King. Righteous judgment meted out immediately....no more dragged out trials. No need for LAWYERS. (no offense to any lawyers out there) Chances are you'll be just as thrilled, too!

Um, no. I just can't imagine what is supposed to be so attractive. This is an excellent description of the USSR under Stalin.

We won't have to question what our King says. Absolute Truth will reign supreme.

The list goes on and on with these wonderful thoughts....

You are scaring me.

You know, the Lost probably don't understand how we look forward to Someone reigning with a "rod of iron". Just as they don't understand how giving our lives away, surrendering our will, brings total freedom in this life. How submission truly works in marriage and in our relationship with the Lord.

No, I don't understand what is so awesome about someone reigning with a rod of iron. Nor do I understand how slavery = freedom and submission = healthy relationship. I don't think

YES!! Soooo looking forward to this time! Just imagine the peace and happiness and fullfillment you will experience knowing you are living under His authority on this planet.

Our hearts and our lives and our relationships will soar!

I'm going to send you to Egypt so you can learn all about democracy.

Can you imagine living in a place where there's no need to lock your doors - there might not even be locks! And children can play outside without parents worrying they'll be kidnapped or murdered. What a glorious day that will be!!!

No, I cannot imagine living on a planet populated by aliens.

The "rod of iron" is how God rules. It simply means that there's no compromise. God's kingdom holds the line in righteousnes and justice. If it was compromised, corruption would ensue, so the Lord isn't making any concessions.

It gives us peace knowing that He runs a kingdom where no evil dwells and that it is secure in every way.

As another has said, I'm looking forward to it.

Why can't any of these people handle spelling "righteous/ness"? So . . . the rod of iron means there will be no mercy, no sympathy, no compromise as if that were a bad thing. Scaring me, you are.

I've been watching FOX News programs (Huckabee/Judge Napolitano/John Stossel) this evening --all of them dealing with our debt crisis and unions and all--loss of our freedoms...) and have been thinking the same thing, Maranatha. Sitting in the chair, I was wondering what it will be like when our Lord governs. We know with each passing day we're getting closer.

So, loss of all our freedoms is bad until Jesus makes the loss of all our freedoms good?

IMO there will be sin in the millenium, thus the need for the 'rod of iron'. Sin will not go unpunished. Saints will serve as judges in disputes among people, and will decide these disputes on the principles and precepts of God, and nothing else. Decisions will be final, as in no endless appeals. No bribes, favorites, etc. There will be peace in nature: the lion and lamb; the child near a viper's nest, etc.
I think only the church actually receives incorruptible and immortal spiritual bodies, and in this way we will display and demonstrate the grace of God through all eternity. I just don't recall having read this particular promise in regard to OT and Trib saints, or residents of earth during the millenium.

AHA! The only reason any person supports fascism/autocracy/theocracy is because they think they will be on the winning end of things. If they thought they'd be on the whipping end of the stick, they'd fight against it with their dying breath. So, losing freedom is bad, unless you'll be the one taking away the freedom, in which case boo-yah!

Our fellow citizens, they are terrifying.

*I guarantee you that's already a porno.

Really? You Just Can't Live Without It?

Now this is a war on Christmas, people.

You know, I just don't understand something. I celebrate Christmas, albeit secularly. I love my deer (sadly reduced to one) and my tree and giving gifts, etc. Love it. LUH it.

However, I love it. That's me. I do what makes me happy, I don't need you to do it for me. I don't need everyone else in the world to love Christmas. Everyone else could stop putting up trees and lights and ignore the day altogether, and I would still love Christmas. I'm not offended that my Jewish bosses don't celebrate Christmas. I'm not offended that my Muslim neighbors aren't carolling their little hearts out on the 25th.

Some people, however, are apparently unable to truly appreciate their own celebrations unless every random business and cashier is wrapped head-to-toe in tinsel and screaming "Merry Christmas" like post-ghost Scrooge on a meth bender. They are so utterly offended by this that they set up a website and review businesses purely on the basis of how much said business celebrates Christmas in line with how the reviewer feels they should. (Basically, did the stressed out, underpaid cashier say "merry christmas" or "happy holidays". "Happy holidays" makes Baby Jesus cry, I guess.)

A Dallas church tired of the political correctness surrounding Christmas has launched a website to report "naughty" businesses that fail to acknowledge the religious meaning of the holiday.

Yes, because it is the business of Target and Walmart to instruct the masses on the religious bases of Christmas. Just from Jesus forward, though. The pagan roots of winter solstice celebrations are not to be explained.

"I realize saying 'Merry Christmas' isn't going to get anyone into heaven," said Pastor Robert Jeffress of First Baptist Church of Dallas after his sermon on Sunday. "But I believe our nation overall is going to be healthier as a nation with a public acknowledgment of God than we are if we allow the secularists, the atheists, the infidels to remove any mention of God from our public arena and that's why I'm doing this."

Yes, because back when men were men and cashiers said "Merry Christmas", we had legally enforced misogyny and racism. That was fucking awesome, man! It's totally the job of businesses to further your religion, rather than appealing to all possible consumers. How could they think otherwise?

The site, which has received wide media attention, asks users to place companies that celebrate Christmas in their public interaction, marketing or advertising on the nice list. Businesses that act like a "Grinch" or "use misplaced political correctness to halt the celebration of Christmas" are called out in the naughty list.

. . .

Walmart made the nice list. One married couple from Hickory, N.C., was pleased that a man wished them "Merry Christmas" as they walked through the produce section.

Nordstrom's policy to say "Happy Holidays" instead of "Merry Christmas" did not impress one shopper who placed it on the naughty list.

Donating money to charity? Worthless if you don't tout Jesus. Paying your workers a living wage? Meaningless if you didn't make them wish customers a Merry Christmas. Excellent benefits for said workers? Just so much dross if there isn't a manger with a plastic baby in it.

I'm fairly certain that is not the spirit o' Christmas, secular or otherwise.

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Did You Know Freud Created Lust?

This deeply homophobic post (proving once again that "love the sinner, hate the sin" is sophistry at its finest) gets pretty darn hilarious pretty darn quickly.

Sex is—have you noticed?—a big deal in our world. It seems to be a truism that every person has a right to whatever sexual experience they want, and that putting limits on sexual practice is somehow offensive to humanity. Maybe Freud is to blame for sexualizing our world and persuading our culture that sexual “repression” was a form of neuroticism. While the theistic consensus regarding morality was eroding away, the Freudian imperative arose to take its place as our source for behavioral norms. This—along with the obvious pleasures of sex—added up to making sexual expression a virtual imperative while removing most limits on what form that expression might take.

Yes, there world was entirely innocent to sex prior to the 1880s. Prior to Freudian Theory, no one ever desired sex or enjoyed sex or lusted at all. Babies were produced as part of a perfunctory act not unlike washing the dishes in level of desirability or enjoyment. It wasn't until Freud thought up penis envy that the people of the world realized that they liked sex and wanted sex. Nobody paid prostitutes for sex prior to that, no one was gay prior to that, and . . . look, not even I can keep that up. The theory that Frued sexualized the world is so insane, I'm flabbergasted. I know thinking about people in the past doing it is a bit weird, given our general views on the past, but I assure you, the world was plenty sexualized prior to Freud.

Psychologists and psychiatrists who follow Freud’s sexual theories have become hard to find. The Freudian framework has been discredited by its utter lack of scientific testability and its poor clinical effectiveness. Yet individuals in Western culture still think they must express their sexuality. So when we Christians tell homosexuals they cannot unite in same-sex “marriage,” and that they should not fulfill their sexual preferences, we’re not just being spoil-sports. It’s as if we’re saying they must deny their own person-ness and stunt their own humanity. They can’t join in the game everyone (and if you look at popular media, we mean everyone) else gets to play.

It's not so much that one "must" express one's sexuality, it's that one cannot avoid expressing one's sexuality. Sexuality is deeply rooted and essential to humans. That is, in fact, why there are humans today. Our ancestors just couldn't stop "expressing their sexuality".

You know how I can prove this? Step outside of America, where it's far from easy to be gay, but it usually isn't deadly, and take a visit to Uganda, where "expressing one's sexuality" (or merely being suspected of being gay) means your picture in the paper and a beating and possible killing to go with it. Think about this logically for one moment. If that's what "expressing one's sexuality" as a choice means, why would anyone do it? If it were possible to deny one's sexual nature long term, wouldn't every gay person in Uganda be doing just that? Since they're not, I think we can reasonably say that denying one's sexuality simply isn't possible long term.

Now, the author does admit that "reparative therapy" (google "Exodus International" if you must, but I'm not linking to that) is a crock, but what is his answer? Replace your sex drive with Jesus.

Jesus demonstrated joy (Luke 10:21, John 3:29), taught joy (Matthew 5:12, Luke 10:17-20, prayed for joy (John 17:13), gave reason for joy (Matthew 28:8, Luke 24:41, John 16:22). All of life is available for us to find joy. This is the message of the most misunderstood book of the Bible (in my opinion), Ecclesiastes, whose theme can be summarized as, There is much pleasure in earth that we may justly pursue, yet ultimate delight is in God himself.

Okay, you do it. Seriously, you give up sex altogether and pray instead. Tell me how it goes 80 years from now. Actually, I don't need you to do that. I just need to look at all the "chaste" priests and their multitudinous sex scandals to know that doesn't work. It's not just the sexless Catholic priests, either, it's married Protestant preachers, who can presumably get some at home, boinking their secretaries and doing meth off the asses of prostitutes. Hello, your own holy men can't hack the prayer instead of sex diet, why do you expect that to work for the rest of us? Logic, anyone?

Why do I even ask? This is religion, we don't need no stinkin' reason.

Overheard on the Bus

Normally, people on the 8:00 bus are comatose, even the teenagers going to the high school, but this morning was different. Maybe it was the 15˚ (-9˚C) weather or the 18 days left till Christmas, but people were talking- about god.

Conversation 1:

One woman was talking to another woman about the Sunday night service at her church. She didn't mention the name of the church, but they're apparently large enough and/or rich enough to afford local TV ads. This service was special in that it featured a talk given by a white woman from Africa ("She's from Africa- but she's white!"), who continually interrupted herself because she was "moved by the spirit to say things about [people in the crowd]."

Fortunately, the woman listening voiced the same questions that popped into my mind: what things? Well, this speaker magically knew that "someone" was having marriage problems and "someone" else was having financial difficulties and yet another person had a family member struggling with addiction. No, she didn't point to a specific person and say, "Jim, I know you're wife is cheating on you with the blond intern, but she'll realize the error of her ways in 67 days and all will be well."

That's right kids, this woman was terribly impressed that, dealing with a crowd of several hundred people, the speaker was able to guess that at least three people had three extremely common problems.Colour me unimpressed, but the woman relating this tale couldn't have been more amazed.*

Conversation 2:

A man gets on the bus and says to the bus driver, apropos of absolutely nothing at all, "Do you know the truth?"

Mind you, this is a city bus, so "the truth" could be anything from Jesus to the Templars implanting listening devices in the speaker's teeth. Accordingly, the bus driver was noncommittal.

"There is a god in heaven. That's right, there's a heaven to look forward to and a hell to avoid and Jesus is the only way to do that."

Perhaps hoping to end the conversation, the bus driver replies, "Oh, yeah, I already knew that."

Of course, there's no stopping these sorts once they get started, so he proceeded to ramble on about how he walked from Pennsylvania to Los Angeles for Jesus. Well, actually he accepted a lot of rides, usually from the police trying to get him off the interstate, but he did it for Jesus!

So, that was my morning, now with 98% more Jesus!

*Sometimes I wonder if it's really worth my morals not to stop struggling financially and just suck these sorts of people dry, but, contrary to popular belief, I'm not actually evil. Well, not that evil, anyway.

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Humbugalicious

It's evil- sparkly, shiny, delightful evil!

My father was a rapid-cycling bipolar with Narcissistic Personality Disorder. You can imagine what my childhood was like, and what it was like for my mother to be married to him. She turned herself into a cipher, concerned only with what he wanted and keeping him happy- except when it came to Christmas.

My mother loves Christmas. She listens to Christmas music all year round. She goes to the Hallmark store and buys expensive ornaments year round. She has three artificial trees that she decorates, beginning the day after Halloween. And she never let my father touch Christmas. There was joy in my house- a bit ruthlessly enforced, perhaps, but joy- during the Christmas season.

I think you can see why I love Christmas.

Tom, at Just Truth, does not. In fact, he hates any Christmas that is not entirely focused on Jesus, and Santa can suck it. He even has a picture of Santa as a horrible, fanged creature, which I found a little upsetting. Tom, commits what I consider a sin, in the way atheists use that word: he assumes that people who think differently do so for malign reasons. I think Santa is great, I celebrate in a secular way, but I do so not because I am a different person with different ideas, but because I am greedy and evil.

The other Christmas, is the one most of the world, and an ever-growing number of Christians celebrate. The Christmas of greed, getting the best deal, plowing over people in target to get grandpa the $200 plasma TV. Knocking out the neighbor for the last pack of silly bands, or going ever deeper into debt so little suzy can have “the best Christmas ever” and only briefly (if then) do thoughts turn to Christ..His birth, His gifts of eternal life, or even dying on the cross for us. This is the Christmas the world knows and loves the one where adorable, obese; grandpas are exalted, and worshipped. How many people would stand in line for hours to get their picture taken with Jesus? How many would stand in line to see Jesus?

You missed the third option, Tom. You missed my Christmas. I like pretty lights and red and green decorations. I like baking cookies and giving them to people who don't expect them: the bus driver, the convenient mart clerk, the Dunkin' Donuts crew*. I like Christmas carols and teasing my nieces and nephews about their gifts ("you didn't want a big, red inflatable plastic pig? That is such a shame!"). I like A Christmas Story and Christmas cards and Christmas dinners with everyone crowded around a table for four and kids hopped up on sugar bouncing around the house eagerly anticipating Santa. I don't give a shit what I get or great deals or anything else. I just like Christmas.

Yeah, I'm not you, but it doesn't make me evil. It also doesn't make my enjoyment of Christmas, different though it may be, any less sincere or any more evil.

*Guess who gets to loiter at the convenient mart? That's right, this woman!

Here I Am, Ray's Impossible Person

Ray claims that the only person who doesn't pray is the person who isn't experiencing trouble.

Show me someone who says he"s never prayed, and I will show you someone who has never been in severe turbulence.

Ray, I'm right here. If I haven't experienced severe turbulence, I don't know who has. My own illness, my husband's MS, my MIL's heart failure, my own mother's health problems, job loss, money woes, mental illnesses among family members and friends . . . other than natural disasters, name a turbulence, I've ridden it out.

And I have not prayed.

Not once. Not for a moment. You know why? I don't believe in the sky daddy, Ray. Praying to a god, any god, would be like praying to my shoes. A pointless waste of time that won't change a thing. You know what I've done instead? Things that improved the situation or improved my mood. Praying won't do either, so I haven't done it.

What I think is truly odd is who did pray. Jesus.

Jesus went to a mountain to pray . . . Jesus continued all night in prayer.

Wut?

Why would Jesus, who is God, pray to God? He prayed to himself. Stop and think about that for a second. That makes no sense at all, at least not in the supplicatory sense of prayer, the begging of favors and mercy. Who begs themselves for anything?

Then Jesus failed to answer his own prayers to himself.

Really, the more I read the Bible and actually pay attention to what's in it, the less sense it makes.

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This Definition of "Enemy" Concerns Me

Love your enemies- or eat them. Up to you.

Enemy: one that is antagonistic to another; especially : one seeking to injure, overthrow, or confound an opponent

It's more than that, though, isn't it? I mean, do you, personally, feel that you have enemies? Other than abstractions, like misogyny or ablism or religion, who has enemies? I don't have enemies. I have people I dislike and people who dislike me, but I'm not even sure I actually hate anyone. Sure, there are people I wouldn't piss on if they were on fire, but hatred, enemies? No. No, I don't.

Perhaps I am unusual. Perhaps the rest of world is beset with hatred and enemies and I am the exception. Perhaps this actually makes sense:

I am sure that if you are a Christian you have either read or heard the verses above. If you are like me you might have said to yourself, “That’s really nice and all, but I could never dream of doing that!” I really need to understand in a very practical way how something even if it is in God’s word makes sense, or I find myself unable to follow it. I never even tried to love my enemies, what I did or thought I was doing is to not have any enemies. But before we can say we do or don’t have an enemy, we need to define what an enemy is.

. . .

So what is an enemy according to the Bible? Someone who persecutes you, hates you or despitefully uses you. What this statement is trying to say is that it ranges from someone who may be constantly trying to kill you to someone who simply treats you badly one time. Who treats you badly? Well a whole lot of people. The person who cuts you off while driving. The person who cuts in front of you in line. The cashier with a bad attitude. Your boss. The friend, relative or even spouse who does not have time for you and puts others before your needs. All of these are your enemies if only for a short time!

A cashier having a bad day is my enemy? My husband, when he is absorbed in recording, is my enemy? Anyone anywhere not putting my needs first is my enemy? Srsly?

That has to be the most disturbing reading of "love your enemy" I've ever seen. Leave it to a fundy to turn a Bible verse I heartily approve of into a reason to be very afraid.

This person's world is filled with endless amounts of enemies: people having bad days, people who aren't paying attention, busy people, depressed people, generally uninterested people. The majority of people he meets are enemies by that definition. It doesn't even matter how he recommends you treat your enemies, not when virtually every person he meets is a new enemy.

Actually, it does get worse. His reasoning for treating his enemies well is just as disturbing as his definition of "enemy".

The way to love your enemies is to view it as a challenge understanding there is a reward at the end. Why do people climb a mountain when it is so so hard to do. For the challenge and the reward. Now I personally don’t think in the case of the mountain that the reward justifies the action, but you can see my point. God wants what's best for us in the long term, just like our parents would. God can only reward us if we go through something. He cannot reward us just because we say we would do something like love our enemies. We have to actually do it.

You treat people well because it is the right thing to do, not because you believe you'll get a cookie at the end. That's just appalling. It's also theologically bizarre when you consider that he believes that mere belief in Jesus earns one a spot in Heaven. What, exactly, is better than Heaven? What possible reward could God provide that would make Heaven any better?

The worst part is, I'm the immoral godless one and I am left very afraid of the godly among us.

Fun with Tracts (not tracks, that's a whole 'nother blog)

Let's have some fun with tracts, shall we?

The earth, the earth, the earth is on fire.

Basically, this tract is the really small print version of, "Did you see that movie? It had planes and floods and stuff and that guy who held a boombox over his head? See, I'm all hip and stuff and I believe in Jesus! Doesn't that make you want to believe in Jesus?

No. And that movie was hilariously bad, though I am very fond of John Cusack, and his sister, Joan. (She was not in that movie.)

"Hi. I'm death and I think I'm lost. I'm supposed to be on an album cover from 1986. Hey, is that guacamole?"



Death! It's scary, but very polite. And scary. Really scary. Believe in Jesus!

You wouldn't believe the options Adobe Photoshop contains! Look at this perspective thingy!

Sentence fragment. Unrelated thought. Something unrelated to evolution. Something explained by evolution. Look, I found a dictionary! The Bible! Believe in Jesus!

Other than providing people like me with amusement, what do you suppose the purpose of tracts are? I can't believe anyone is swayed by small print tripe like this.