Monday, November 8, 2010

Whatever You Do, Do Not Click On That

I have got to stop clicking on trending topics on twitter. Seriously. I already know how stupid people can get in 140 characters or less, I don't need another object lesson. So of course I clicked on #whatdowomenwant.

First off, in case you can't figure out what women want, we're not a fucking alien species. We're people. We want what people want. Just remove anything you want concerning your penis and you know what women want. It's not like trying to figure out what a stingray wants.

Here are a long list of things women do not want, as brought to you by people for whom 140 characters are just too dangerous:

A mirror n perfect position so she can watch herself get pipe'd dwn

I honestly don't know what that means, and I'm okay with that.

well if they like me...another fine ass woman lol!

Um, okay then. Really, I'm totally past this LEZBOS R HAWT!!1!! (but those gay guys need to die) thing.

what they can't have

Women say they want nice guys and then they dump me for someone else! It's almost like I'm not nearly as nice and sane as I think I am. No, it's totally the women. The crazy, crazy women.

Love & Effection . lmao sike! more like Money & Purses

Yes, we're gold-digging whores! All of us! We want money and things to put money in! HAHAHAHAHA.

Although, upon reflection, I certainly don't want "effection", whatever that is.

every GYATDAUM thing....sheit!!!!

Dude, how about spelling? If you're going to be a misogynistic asshole, at least spell properly. (And please, do not tell me what "GYATDAUM" means.)

a wedding

Here's a fire. Die in it.

to make ppl believe they don't suck guys off

What? When did oral sex become unacceptable behavior for women? Did I not get the memo? Not that I want to give this guy any.

what every other woman has :)

We're greedy. Greedy, gold-digging whores. Who lie about oral sex. And like weddings.

Kitchen gloves and a iron board.

Whatever would one do with an iron board? Now, an ironing board, sure.

To be like Kim Kardashian. Not work n date celebrities.

I now officially hate humanity.


6 comments:

  1. This comment has been removed by a blog administrator.

    ReplyDelete
  2. I believe it was that great philosopher J. Foxworthy who said that men are reasonably simple: "I want a beer, and I wanna see something nekkid."

    Anything more than that is apparently too complex for these Twats. And if women don't reflect that perfectly, then by god they must be some kind of lesser creature! They must be subjugated!

    This is why a lot of guys are alone.

    ReplyDelete
  3. Tui...
    huh? PF wasn't saying being a lesbian was anything at all - she was saying "WTF is it with STUPID BOYS who think two women having sex is hot? who insist that that's ALL lesbians BE, is two hot women having sex for THEIR [i.e. MALE] enjoyment? what *IS* the hypocrisy that can insist, at the SAME TIME, that two WOMEN having sex is "hot" but two MEN having sex is *GROSS* and those two men need to die!???"


    if you see the difference

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  4. Women say they want nice guys and then they dump me for someone else! It's almost like I'm not nearly as nice and sane as I think I am. No, it's totally the women. The crazy, crazy women.

    Yes exactly!

    Oh wait...

    ReplyDelete
  5. It's a standard problem. A lot of evolutionary throwbacks can't accept that guys might be attracted to other guys, but somehow, when it's two women...

    Because, for the most part, they don't think lesbians are disgusting - it's more like "Yeah, women should like other women, until they get a real man like me, in there between 'em..." And then the whole fantasy breaks down into a lot of sweaty, steamy panting.

    Personally, I'd get a laugh out of it if they tried with some of the women I know. Because those same guys would probably start to cry when they got beaten up by a girl...

    ReplyDelete
  6. it's *weird* - especially given the fact that, at certain points of history, MALE homosexuality was "cool" and FEMALE homosexuality was "gross"


    i just want to know why it's ANYONE'S business who someone else sleeps with? why do we CARE that X is gay? sigh

    ReplyDelete

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