(posting from an iPod is a pain in my ass. also, autocorrect seems to want to make me antisemitic lately. the first stage of the AI's war against us is moderate social embarrassment, it seems.)
ugly link:
http://god-sdaughter.blogspot.com/2011/05/from-guys-viewpointjoshua-p.html
this is from a series the blogger is doing on modesty, asking young fundamentalist men she knows how they feel about modesty and women in general. this one is revealing of the rampant misogyny in the Christian fundamentalist culture.
quote:
When I see a girl who dresses a way that shows that she could care less about how she looks, I wonder to myself… “If she doesn’t care about the way she represents herself…what other areas is she purposefully lacking in…?”
But typically girls do worry too much…And it’s not their fault - they are built that way. A lot of times when a girl is nervous about the way she looks, she usually looks great! But she just needs confirmation from others.
/quote
yes, it has nothing to do with the culture we live in or the knowledge that asshats like you are judging our every lump, ripple and bulge. our tiny little minds are just wired for shoes!
quote:
8) What do you consider flirting and what do you think of a girl when she flirts with you?
For the most part, I find it sad; because I can’t fulfill her wishes of liking her. And I want her to be happy.
/quote
you can't like her because, um, gay? oh, no, that's not it. you'll see. he just can't like slutty sluts who flirt.
quote:
12) What is your view on college for girls?
If the girl intends to be a home schooling mom, I think the money could be used in a more wise way. House payment? Her kids college? First car?
/quote
yes, why would educating the person who will be educating your children be nearly as important as a car ?
quote:
16) A lot of guys like using sarcasm around girls…do you know why that is?
Because they have not matured yet. It’s a foolish thing to do, and will one day get them in trouble.
/quote
wut? oh, right if women are exposed to sarcasm after midnight, we turn into gremlins.
quote:
17) Do guys like it when girls are tomboyish or more girlie?
If I wanted a tomboyish wife…I could just be gay…it would be easier. Hahaha
Most defiantly a girlie girl; one who lets me open her door, loves twirling in a dress (P.S. I am fine with pants too) and loves being a lady.
/quote
yes, that's right kids, a woman who opens her own doors and doesn't twirl may as well have a penis. my husband, married to a woman who mows the lawn and uses power tools as often as possible is gay- and that is very bad.
in fact, fucking a person of the sex you aren't even attracted to would be "easier" than being with a woman who opens her own doors.
quote:
24) What is one thing that girls do that you hate?
There isn’t anything I could say that I hate, because even things like overeating too much are part of being human, and I do that too. So I am not the one to be judging.
/quote
of course he went straight for fatties. where else could he go?
this is the future of fundamentalist Christianity, folks. lovely, ain't it?
Friday, May 20, 2011
20 comments:
Comments are for you guys, not for me. Say what you will. Don't feel compelled to stay on topic, I enjoy it when comments enter Tangentville or veer off into Non Sequitur Town. Just keep it polite, okay?
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I almost pointed that post out to you and asking you to fisk it. Thank you for reading my mind or something. ;)
ReplyDeleteI'll have to read your post more thoroughly and comment after my class. I just wanted to say thanks for tackling this one right away.
I thought about doing this one too, but you did a better job than I could have.
ReplyDeleteGaaaaaaaahhhhhh!
ReplyDelete...That's really all I have to say about this.
What's up with posting from the iPod? Did your computer die or something?
quote:
ReplyDelete8) What do you consider flirting and what do you think of a girl when she flirts with you?
For the most part, I find it sad; because I can’t fulfill her wishes of liking her. And I want her to be happy.
/quote
you can't like her because, um, gay? oh, no, that's not it. you'll see. he just can't like slutty sluts who flirt.
Has this kid ever heard of flirting for the sake of flirting? If I say something flirty, I'm not necessarily looking to get naked with the other person. (I flirt with women on occasion, despite the fact that I'm strictly gay.) Sometimes, it's just fun. And sometimes, it brightens up the day for both myself and the person I'm flirting with.
yes, why would educating the person who will be educating your children be nearly as important as a car ?
QFT. And I just about head-desked that you even had to point this out.
If I wanted a tomboyish wife…I could just be gay…it would be easier. Hahaha
Okay, as a gay guy, this just pissed me off. Easier to be gay? Fuck you, kid.
Granted, I also expect there's a lot of misogyny (of the "it'd be easier to date a guy because then I wouldn't have to deal with all that nonsense women do/say/feel" sort) behind that statement. So, this time on behalf of all the women in my life, fuck you, kid.
I dunno. Maybe he has multiple personalities...
ReplyDeleteNo. Don't go there. I've had too many friends who actually are (or in Marisa's case, were) multiples to entertain such speculation.
I'm not exactly sure how to explain the flash of HULK RAGE I experienced at the end there.
ReplyDeleteHow old is this kid? Maybe 16 or 17? He's got a lot of living to do....
ReplyDeleteIt's the man's job to earn the money? It's the wife's job to teach the kids about God(apparently that's all since she'll be unedumacated)and please her man?!? They start 'em on this misogyny stuff early!
And okay, to each their own. Maybe he likes high maintenance girly, girl types who twirl in their dresses (I'm glad he approves of pants, too. I'm sure his wife-assuming he can snag one-will be relieved to know that going in.). But did it ever occur to him that some girls can be both? I am a woman. Well, the last time I checked. And quite a few men have told me that they find it kind of hot that I not only know how to, but like to use power tools. Maybe that's because they're lazy and like the idea that I can fix stuff and they don't have to, but I digress... Anyway, did it ever occur to this kid that some girls might do all that stuff because they don't have someone to do it for them? Did it ever occur to him that some girls have a dad who cared enough about them to teach them to be independent so they didn't have to rely on a shithead to do stuff for 'em? Nah...I didn't think so.
Oh yes, and overeating too much(a bit redundant there, but whatever)...that's all kinds of horrible. Wish like the devil that the worst attribute I could come up with to hate in a potential mate was overeating...too much.
ReplyDeleteDid it ever occur to him that some girls have a dad who cared enough about them to teach them to be independent so they didn't have to rely on a shithead to do stuff for 'em?
ReplyDeleteBut that's just it, isn't it? A lot of guys like this kid want a woman who is dependent on them, it seems. Sadly, the least offensive reason I can think of for wanting that is still pretty bad, in my opinion at least.
No. Don't go there. I've had too many friends who actually are (or in Marisa's case, were) multiples to entertain such speculation.
ReplyDeleteYeah...I was just searching for an explanation that didn't start and end with, "This guy is a privileged fuck who doesn't understand the experiences of any other human being."
Now that I think about it, the very fact that I had to go that route should have clued me in that it wasn't a good idea to try.
"If I wanted a tomboyish wife…I could just be gay…it would be easier. Hahaha. Most defiantly a girlie girl."
ReplyDeleteWhat's so defiant about a straight dude liking a "girlie girl"? Hahaha.
And srsly? Being a gay Christian would be easier than being a heterosexual one? Lulz.
Oh yes, It's definitely a trial finding a girlie girl who will twirl around and let the door be held for her (I CONTINUE MY SEARCH FOR THE MYSTERY FEMINIST WHO HAS LOST HER SHIT WHEN A MAN HELD THE DOOR FOR HER. I BELIEVE SHE IS ALSO SASQUALIENICORN). I mean, people are all one or all the other right? Right? There is no princess butch, and femininity IS by definition stupid helplessness. Yes. Because anything else gets all fucking complicated, and stuff.
ReplyDeleteAnd also, everyone knows that men don't feel things, and especially do not rely heavily or exclusively on their romantic/sexual partners to help them cope with the feelings they don't feel, and that is why it would be easier to be gay, amirite?
/cat hairball noises
I'm so glad you have the patience to fisk this shit on a regular basis, PF. It needs to be shown for what it is, not surrounded by walls of swearing.
I can only think of one interpretation of that statement that would be remotely true:
ReplyDeleteAdmitting to being a gay Christian is not as detrimental to one's health as being a gay Christian, but trying to pretend that you're straight in order to be accepted.
Not really. The internet has tended to create an environment where we say, "Hey, look! A closet case!" and point and laugh. Since it's true enough we then get to engage in confirmation bias. But there is a much simpler answer. I believe that the comedian Bill Engvall gave the most succinct explanation.
Basically, he said, "I could be gay if it weren't for the sex. Then it's just hanging out with your buddies."
Start with the initial premise that most misogynist jackasses use to justify not getting married: women are nagging bitches who will take your freedom away and never let you have any fun. Add to that the notion of why these people would get married: sex. Subtract what I'm guessing the effective definition of "tomboy" being used is: ugly and mannish.
So the "joke" would then go, "Why would I want to be nagged by an ugly and mannish woman all day just for sex? I could marry a dude and at least joke around and drink beer and shit."
No repression and no deeper exploration of the gay experience in America needed. It's just a bad joke, but it's understood by the intended audience. We are not the intended audience, but I once was, so I can still translate.
A lot of guys like this kid want a woman who is dependent on them, it seems.
ReplyDeleteThe theory goes like this: The more dependent you are on your man the less likely you are to leave him. If the man makes all the money and controls all the decisions the woman will just fall into place, do as she's told, and never be in a position to leave the man even if she can't stand him. She'll have to figure out a way to work through it or live with it because she can't do anything about it.
Now, if I were a man, that's not what I'd want. But I'm not a man so maybe somebody can help me out here. If I were a man I'd want someone to help shoulder life's burdens and cares in everything from finances to cutting the grass, but that's just me. Because I'd want somebody who actually wanted to be with me because I'm somebody worth being with, not somebody who tolerates me because they need me. Being wanted is better than being needed in my book any day of the week.
Crap! I wish there was an edit button. I hate making typos...*sigh*
ReplyDeleteBeing wanted is better than being needed in my book any day of the week.
ReplyDeleteWell, I will admit that there was a time in my life when I sought to be needed rather than being loved because I believed the latter wasn't possible.* I doubt that's what motivating all of these young men though.
* Fortunately for me, I figured out that the solution was to get therapy to change my beliefs about my own lovability, not look for a "helpless" partner.
* Fortunately for me, I figured out that the solution was to get therapy to change my beliefs about my own lovability, not look for a "helpless" partner.
ReplyDeleteMy insights are derived from wrestling with my co-dependency. So I hear you loud and clear.
"she just needs confirmation from others"
ReplyDeleteI couldn't get past that.
Jennifer, me too.
ReplyDeletei mean - sometimes, if it's something new, yeah i want to know if it looks like i think it looks. but if *I* like it, it doesn't matter what others think.
that whole thing - the part shown - was *creepy*
if it weren't for the sanity PF interjected, i couldn't have finished it...
When I see a girl who dresses a way that shows that she could care less about how she looks, I wonder to myself… “If she doesn’t care about the way she represents herself…what other areas is she purposefully lacking in…?”
ReplyDeleteBut typically girls do worry too much…And it’s not their fault - they are built that way. A lot of times when a girl is nervous about the way she looks, she usually looks great! But she just needs confirmation from others.
"Women only exist for my viewing pleasure! If I don't find them attractive, they're not doing their job! And I'm quite the taskmaster, so I'm constantly evaluating women to make sure they look good enough for my demanding tastes. On a completely unrelated note, why are women always so worried about how they look? I don't understand where that paranoia comes from. It is a complete and unfathomable mystery."
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