Monday, July 12, 2010

Not Even Brain Bleach Will Save You

There is a category of blog post I refer to as Unintentional TMI: Do You Even Realize What You Have Told the Entire World?!, which A.GuyMaligned (misogynist extraordinaire) seems to specialize in.

Given that he is a misogynist (loud! proud! overly verbose!), I'm not surprised that he thinks women should be virgins on their wedding days, but men should not, which leads me to wonder if he understands that for this to be true, there would have to be a permanent underclass of unmarriageable sluts available to have sex with these single men, or perhaps one really, really overworked woman taking one (or many) for the team. (Males and females are evenly balanced in most societies, so in his perfect world, a certain number of men and women will never get married, the men because there aren't any virgins of age left to marry. Maybe he thinks married women should have sex with single men . . . I am putting way too much thought into this.)

It's his attempt at an explanation other than "I really, really hate women" that gets its passport stamped at the border to the Kingdom of Unintentional TMIs.

Her Highness Boomer Babe commented at post 145, “It’s best for both to stay virgins BEFORE they get married….” She may be right, but I’m far less certain about bridegrooms. First, some background about the male nature.

Shame and fear about females are natural to teen males until dampened by successful relationships with girls, whatever that means to each boy. Sexual conquest relieves shame. Relating successfully with girls relieves fear.

Disturbing on so many levels. "Sexual conquest"? You can only "conquer" the unwilling. I enjoy sex and am an active participant in my own sex life. In his world, every sex act has a rape-like quality to it that shouldn't turn him on as much as it clearly does. Ew.

Men KNOW they are loaded with sexual ability and seek to prove their prowess. It’s their competitive nature again. They need confirmation of at least their adequacy, preferably in adolescence but no later than early adulthood. But ‘adequacy’ means this: If she enjoyed it, he’s great. If she didn’t, she’s to blame. Thus, men confirm their sexual prowess through experience designed by Nature so that they never lose (unless they fail to perform at all and shame results).

Men KNOW. They KNOW. They KNOW that they are "loaded with sexual ability". What does that even mean? Are we equating sexual ability with the ability to achieve an erection? Hey, good for you, the hydraulics work like they're supposed to. Let's go get you a commemorative plaque. AGM doesn't even bother to prove why men need confirmation of what they all uppercase know by a certain age.

Adequacy, in AGM's world, means that women never win. Surprise, surprise. If the sex is good, it's his triumph. If the sex is bad, it's her failure. If you're having sex with AGM (why? why would you do that?), you'd better buy a good vibrator, because you're not having an orgasm otherwise. Why? Because that's not AGM's problem. He's conquered, relieved his shame and has moved on.

I am stunned by this admission. I probably know lots of men who are bad in bed, but I don't know any who tell the world about it with pride.


8 comments:

  1. "Men KNOW they are loaded with sexual ability and seek to prove their prowess. It’s their competitive nature again. They need confirmation of at least their adequacy, preferably in adolescence but no later than early adulthood."

    Gaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaah. Speak for yourself, Creepy Guy. In fact, I'll go a step further: don't presume to speak for me. Seriously, just shut up - now.

    This guy represents masculinity in about the same way that Fred Phelps represents Christianity.

    ReplyDelete
  2. Shame and fear about females are natural to teen males until dampened by successful relationships with girls, whatever that means to each boy. Sexual conquest relieves shame. Relating successfully with girls relieves fear.

    Um...what?

    If this douchebag were in the room right now I'd have one thing to say: speak for yourself, sparky.

    I mean, honestly, I get the fear part. I still lapse into an inability to talk to women sometimes. And I've managed to relate to many women successfully over the years. It's generally about wanting to approach someone I've never seen or spoken to before in my life, however, and the fear isn't based on the woman, but based on, y'know, making an ass of myself.

    But shame? What, exactly, am I ashamed of? Specifically, what am I ashamed of that I can fix by "conquering" a woman?

    Oh, wait, maybe he's actually ashamed of himself because somewhere, deep down inside, he knows he's a misogynist pig. Or he's a deeply closeted gay fellow.

    Men KNOW they are loaded with sexual ability and seek to prove their prowess. It’s their competitive nature again. They need confirmation of at least their adequacy, preferably in adolescence but no later than early adulthood.

    I don't KNOW that I'm loaded with sexual ability. In fact, I strongly suspect I'm not. But I don't KNOW that, either. It kinda goes with the territory of, y'know, not having sex.

    But here's the thing: it's not really a big deal. I'll get around to it when I get around to it. And I won't be very good at it at first.

    I'm honest and up front about such things. And I'm willing to learn and take constructive criticism. And practice. Perhaps a lot.

    So, chances are, I'll end up being pretty good at it, specifically because I don't want to hear someone say, "You're the best I've ever had," then wait for me to leave so she can do it herself.

    ReplyDelete
  3. Wow. This is frightening. I read this and I basically feel as though I'm reading the inadvertent confession of an acquaintance rapist.

    ReplyDelete
  4. I was going to post a response to Geds, but I can't bring myself to type it - even with tongue firmly in cheek, this whole worldview is just too repulsive.

    ReplyDelete
  5. First reaction: Speak for yourself.
    Second reaction: Wait, PF's right, you are speaking for yourself.
    Third reaction: AAARGH!
    Forth reaction: *brain bleach*

    ReplyDelete
  6. Around middle school, my boys noticed that their male friends stopped talking to girls as people. It bothered them that the friends' comments about the girls they'd known since kindergarten were now about the "parts" of those girls (i.e.: "Lookit the tits on Amanda!"). I think their friends (supported by men who only see "parts" and think that means they love women) had forgotten how to be equals/FRIENDS with girls. They (the boys) were now afraid of the girls. I think that fear easily becomes misogyny, to avoid revealing any potential weakness.

    They're now 24. I know they've had sex with girlfriends, but I doubt either has had any "conquests", because, you see, they still actually LIKE women.

    ReplyDelete
  7. this reminds me of a sad conversation i just had with my best friend.

    see, she was another of those raised fundy. when i first met her [and her abusive-rapist-now-ex-husband] her marriage was having issues because "she didn't like sex".
    and the issue was that she was RAISED TO BELIEVE sex was "dirty" and "wrong" and "ONLY for procreation" and so her husband demanding daily sex, and then "perverse" sex [blow jobs and anal, etc], was fucking with her. HARD. on the one hand, she was required to be subservient to him and do whatever he wanted. on the other hand, the things he wanted were "wrong".

    so he started raping her, instead. and finally, finally, i got her to leave him. and i CHEERED so much and threw her a party, because it's almost IMPOSSIBLE for someone to ACTUALLY leave their abuser on the FIFTH try, and she managed, completely, on the FIRST.


    and she has a boyfriend now. and she and boyfriend are both VERY upset, because she doesn't orgasm.
    boyfriend feels that this means he's a lousy lay.
    bestfriend feels that this means SHE'S a lousy lay.

    she wanted my advice. and i TRIED, but damn was my heart breaking. she's almost 30, she's cute and attractive to most men, she's really sweet, she's learning that she CAN take care of herself - and she's saying to me "i like it, but it's not getting me to that orgasm. how to i get an orgasm without hurting his feelings?"

    BECAUSE TELLING HIM WHAT SHE LIKES IS APPARANTLY WRONG. if she says ANYTHING, she's afraid that it'll be "wrong" because apparantly men can't handle being told what their sexual partner likes. for whatever dumnfuck reason i can't understand.

    fuck. i HATE assholes, like this guy, like my friend's father and ex-husband, who instil this SHIT. :(

    ReplyDelete
  8. Personal Failure: are you making fun of the "differently logicked" again? Shame on you.

    ReplyDelete

Comments are for you guys, not for me. Say what you will. Don't feel compelled to stay on topic, I enjoy it when comments enter Tangentville or veer off into Non Sequitur Town. Just keep it polite, okay?

I am attempting to use blogger's new comment spam feature. If you don't immediately see your comment, it is being held in spam, I will get it out next time I check the filter. Unless you are Dennis Markuze, in which case you're never seeing your comment.

Creative Commons License
Forever in Hell by Personal Failure is licensed under a Creative Commons Attribution-NoDerivs 3.0 Unported License.
Based on a work at foreverinhell.blogspot.com.