Thursday, February 17, 2011

An Interesting Interpretation

I hated my senior year English teacher. She was a cruel person who thought nothing of mocking students for being overweight or having severe acne or being poor. So, I spent the entire year mocking her by interpreting everything we read as relating to death. The Great Gatsby? The death of a dream. Brave New World? The death of individuality and morality. Everything was death.

One day, she decided to stump me by assigning a poem about a cat. The entire poem was simply a description of the author's cat, nothing more. (I don't remember the name anymore.) "So, Faith, how is this related to death?" she taunted me.

"I'm sure that cat's dead by now, and all the author has left is her memories and this poem," I replied. Everyone laughed, I got sent to talk to a rather befuddled principal ("I have to talk to you because she didn't like your interpretation of a poem?") and both of us learned an important lesson. She learned not to challenge me and I learned that while it is possible to interpret everything through a very specific lens, it takes a lot of effort.

Abigail Ruth of Culture News is expending just such an effort every day for far less amusing reasons.

Enabling Men to Push The Pill on Girls

It's ironic that feminists want to make it easier for men wanting sex to force medications on young girls by making birth control pills and abortifacients* available without a prescription.

Wow, that's quite the scandal there, isn't it? Feminists want to make it easy for men to force medication on young girls. I'm shocked! and appalled! and dismayed! Feminists are actively trying to mandate that grown men shove dangerous drugs down the throats of 8 year olds!

Or, you know, not.

What's actually happening is that a D.C. council member tried to introduce legislation that would allow women to buy birth control pills from the pharmacist without a prescription. This would remove on barrier that women encounter when attempting to control their fertility, having to take time off from work to see a doctor, and having to pay for that visit.

That's odd. I don't see anything in there about men, young girls, or forcing. Nor does Abigail Ruth make the slightest attempt to prove her initial, peculiar assertion, other than to intimate that perhaps men could purchase birth control pills. There's also nothing about "young girls", which I would like an explanation of in that young girls don't menstruate and therefore do not need birth control to prevent pregnancy. I am left questioning Abigail's understanding of biology and wondering what definitions of "young" and "girls" we're using here.

Oh, wait, the producers of Plan B (the "morning after pill") are attempting to have age restrictions removed from their product. That didn't help me understand her initial assertion either.

Now, Abigail, if you're going to relate everything to child molestation, you should put at least as much effort into it as I did in pissing off my English teacher. It's like you're not even trying!


  1. Or she could challenge the men who are doing the actual "forcing."

    But, you know, she won't.

  2. Ah, just what men count on: naïve women who raise like girls

  3. i agree with Fannie - if there are men who do that, they should be challenged and punished. because that's a violation on SO many levels.

    but - this idea works in Britain. BC is OTC [you have to talk to the pharmacist, so maybe "otc" isn't exactly correct] and there's no huge problem. except how many people STILL won't use it [there was a campaign run a few years ago, along the lines of "being prepared doesn't make you a slut". we NEED that campaign!]

  4. Maybe the Council Member is male, and so that's where she got the "men are forcing BCP on girls" bit? I'm stretching, because I really can't see how allowing women to circumvent the gatekeeping practices of the AMA counts as "forcing" anything.


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