Thursday, March 24, 2011

Insert Clever Title Here (Snarking on Stupidity- I've Run Out of Titles)

Miss Raissa is awesome! She's like Ray Comfort without the smarm. (Really, I think she's serious, which makes it all the more hilarious. Ray I have my doubts about.)

This is from a long post about Adam and Eve and the apple* and why women should not be equal to men:

have spoken with extreme feminists, who fight daily to create equality between men and women. One day I asked them this question: Why is it that you want to be equal to men but you don’t believe a man should hit a woman? They were incapable of answering my question accordingly.

Really? They were incapable of coming up with an answer to that question? Are you sure "incapable" is the word you are looking for? Because the answer to that question is easy: violence is unacceptable behavior in general, and is especially unacceptable in relationships of any kind. No one should be hitting anyone, male or female. Ever. For any reason. Violence's only purpose is to promote fear and pain, there is no place for that in relationships. Fin.

I cannot wait for this:

There is so much left to talk about. We shall cover the rest in part two the report. I mentioned the other day that a woman’s fuel is love and a man’s fuel is respect. Women want to be loved and men want to be respected. A few people disagreed with my statement and asked that I do a scientific poll. I will do that and will report it in part two.

Can you imagine what Miss Raissa's concept of "scientific" is in this context? I am squealing with joy!

I will leave you with a classic from Hell:

See, Yhwh put a tree in the center of the Garden of Eden, the Tree of Knowledge of Good and Evil. Actually, it was two trees. He also put the Tree of Life in the center of Garden of Eden. Now, being omnipotent, if he didn't want anyone to eat of the fruit of either of those Trees, he could have put them outside of the Garden of Eden, or put them on top of a mountain, or put a fence around them, but no, he just leaves the Trees right there where anyone can get at them.

Then, Yhwh puts two people, two completely innocent people, who have been alive all of one day, who have no concept of right or wrong, who have never seen or heard of death, in the Garden with the Trees. The Trees he didn't want these two people to touch. Then he told them they would die if they ate the fruit.

Did I mention Yhwh is supposed to be omniscient?

Yhwh: You can eat anything you want, but don't eat from the Tree of Knowledge of Good and Evil

Eve: Why not?

Yhwh: Because I'll fjwuieruthf you if you do.

Adam: What?

Yhwh: I will fjwuieruthf you if you eat from the Tree of Knowledge of Good and Evil.

*Adam and Eve look at one another*

Eve: Ummm . . . what's fjwuieruthf?

Yhwh: You know, I'll fjwuieruthf you if you do it.

Eve (to Adam): You've been around twice as long as me, what's fjwuieruthf?

Adam (shrugs): I dunno. Maybe it's one of those furry things I haven't named yet?

Yhwh: Look, you eat that fruit and I'll fjwuieruthf you! End of discussion.

Eve: That fruit looks pretty tasty. What do you call it again?

Adam: Snorg.

Eve: Snorg? Really? Are you sure you don't like apple better?

Adam: What's wrong with snorg?

Eve: I let you have platypus.

Adam: I guess apple's okay.

Eve: Well, that apple looks pretty tasty, and we don't know that fjwuieruthf is bad. Maybe it's not bad at all.

Yhwh: I can assure you that fjwuieruthf is very bad. Very, very bad.

Adam: Yeah, but what is it?

Eve: Maybe you could fjwuieruthf something else in the Garden and then we could decide if fjwuieruthf is bad enough to make us not try the apple.

Yhwh: I can't fjwuieruthf anything! This is the Garden of Eden, nothing ever fjwuieruthfs!

Adam: So, wait, will you or won't you fjwuieruthf us? We're in the Garden. Why can we be fjwuieruthfed?

Eve: Screw this, I'm eating the apple.

*Not really an apple, actually, "apple" at the time of the King James translation was a generic term for fruit.


  1. Well the Latin for Apple is Malus. The Latin for evil is Malum but the adjective of evil is Malus. Now you decide where the mistake was made. ;)

  2. you left out the part where the serpent comes in and says
    "oh, bullshit, that lying Yhwh's just shining you on, coz he doesn't want you to know anything."

  3. oddly, the serpent was telling the truth.


    That was the last of my Catholic upbringing imploding.

  4. Why doesn't she understand that "equality" means (in part) that NOBODY gets hit?

    And I think in a healthy relationship, love INCLUDES respect. You can respect someone you don't love, but I find it impossible to love someone I don't respect.

    This level of stoopid makes me want to post on her blog, "But my husband is an atheist. It would be wrong for me to believe what you write and therefore defy the master of my household!"
    ......No, that would still make me retch.

  5. I think that, with this remarkable and incisive approach to science, we should really put Miss Raissa in charge of finding a cure for cancer. I'm pretty sure she could put all those lying "scientists" in their place and come straight to the only correct answer. It should only be a matter of days, I expect; perhaps just hours.

  6. Michael, that's either brilliant or insane. We should try it and see.

    Mutzali: I take it you've never seen sincere discussions of just that topic? Well, not exactly. I have seen long, involved discussions in which women who believe in headship authority and staying at home are married to men who do not believe in that and what are the women to do, hold firm to their beliefs or act under their husbands'?

    It gets very confusing, very quickly, for everyone involved.

  7. "Why is it that you want to be equal to men but you don’t believe a man should hit a woman?"
    Worldview. Shattered. Miss Raissa just blew my mind.

    Like, right out the back of my head. Grey-matter everywhere.

    "I mentioned the other day that a woman’s fuel is love and a man’s fuel is respect. Women want to be loved and men want to be respected."
    "And I think in a healthy relationship, love INCLUDES respect. You can respect someone you don't love, but I find it impossible to love someone I don't respect."
    Love is technically possible without respect, but as you said: not in a healthy relationship. Pick any number of unhealthy or perverted relationships, though, and love-without-respect is often a big aspect: aggressive-stalker/cheating-spouse/abusive-partner.

    Miss Raissa's perfect couple:
    Woman: "Actually, I thought we might..."
    Woman: "But..."
    Man: "LOVE YOO HONEY."

    Hmm... actually, the "fuel" analogy is a good one for distinguishing introverts and extroverts: intro's gain fuel/energy from being alone and are drained during social situations, while extroverts follow inverse rules: getting energy from social situations and other people and losing it while they're alone.

  8. i have trouble even paying attention to women who want to be LESS THAN men. to be submissive.

    to me, "submission" is either part of a specific type of kink, or it's a wolf who lost the fight for pack dominance. either way - i'm not into it.

    also - anyone who loves me BETTER fucking respect me. it's lack of RESPECT that leads to the worst abuses...


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