Tuesday, August 4, 2009

We'll All Be Gay!

gay, homosexual, opine, editorials, stupid, homophobia, marriage, same sex, traditional,
Homophobes can be amusing, especially when they whip out that most disturbing of "arguments" against gay marriage/gay people in general: if we let gay people just be gay everywhere then we'll all be gay!

This "argument" hinges on one of the oddest ideas I've ever heard: heterosexuality is an act. No one is really heterosexual, we're all just pretending due to cultural norms. Therefore, if being gay were completely societally acceptable, like wearing jeans or drinking coffee, we'd all throw off the shackles of heteroconformity and dance gayly through the streets, waving rainbow flags, wearing nothing but lavender feather boas and kissing members of our own sex with wild abandon.

No offense to my gay friends, but I don't care how normative homosexuality becomes, I'm heterosexual. In fact, were I to be transported to Opposite Universe, where heterosexuality is treated the way homosexuality is in this universe, I'd still be hetero.

Sexual orientation is not a choice, people. It goes both ways. Homosexuals don't choose to be homosexuals and heterosexuals do not choose to be heterosexuals. We are what we are. Roberto, of the Opine Editorials tmi's the world with his differing opinion.

When people will be taught from an early age that gay is acceptable, gay is good, there is nothing wrong or bad about it, even how pleasurable and fun it can be…… allow me to explain. Roberto is pissed off that some people want to teach children about homosexuality the same way as heterosexuality. as soon as we start teaching children the joys of hetero sex, you let me know. how many of them, when reaching sexual maturity, might not be tempted to experiment with homosexuality? and? i just don't care, to be honest. what's the difference between experimenting with homosexual sex and experimenting with heterosexual sex? besides, the fact is, very few people that aren't inclined that way are going to give it a try. asshat.

After all, why not? because if you're hetero, you're just not into that.No educator or public instance will have ever taught them that there is anything wrong, bad, or immoral about this because there isn't. once this is a policy approved and imposed by government. SOCIALIST FACIST KENYANS WILL MAKE YOUR KIDS GAY! In fact, it will probably be just the opposite! okay, pronouns are good and all, but you need to restate the original noun occasionally for clarity.

And what effect will this have on the time-honored ideal of the sexual relationship as the union of a man and a woman legitimately united in a bond of wondrous, life-giving power? is this the basis of a comic book? seriously, wtf are you talking about?

It will utterly corrupt this ideal! It will desecrate it! you used the same pronoun twice in one sentence to mean two different things. English fail. It will make impossible any ideal of the the sexual relationship once it is divorced from procreation and leave a gaping hole that will invite sexual anarchy. And sexual anarchy is simply anarchy! BWAHAHAHAHAHA!!!! oh, that was awesome. i'm definitely going to have to give some serious thought to joining the anarchist movement. i had no idea it would be so fun.

The politics of homosexuality is an appallingly corruptive force! and you are an appallingly ignorant little man, but you don't see me complaining.

Roberto, that closet has a door. Use it.


  1. I know I'm heterosexual.

    The way I figured that out is simple: I look at a member of the female gender and I can pretty much instantly tell you whether I'd want to have sex with her and why. Of course that opinion might change, but on a simple, physical level I can look and say "yes" or "no" pretty much immediately.

    Meanwhile, I have no idea why anyone would ever want to have sex with a man. You can explain it to me, but I won't get it. It's as simple as that.

  2. If looking at Zachary Quinty or Naveen Andrews doesn't do anything for you, you're just not into men.

  3. Exactly. I'm glad we had that talk.

  4. Roberto acts like it would be a bad thing if people experimented with homosexuality. I don't think he gets that even if straight people experiment with homosexuality when they're younger they will still turn out straight, you know, because of them being straight and all. It's sort of like how many (most?) gay people experiment with heterosexuality when they're younger because it's way more socially acceptable. Even when I tried to have boyfriends it didn't make me heterosexual.

    But more importantly, where is this Opposite Universe you speak of and how do I go live there?!

  5. First you must find the Floaty Sand . . . oh, and there's unicorns involved . . . you somehow have to get them to the Large Hadron Collider . . .

    It's complicated.

  6. First you must find the Floaty Sand . . .

    I think the Floaty Sand only works with male hairdressers. After all, you put it in your shoes and get five pounds lighter...

  7. Some moron said: "It will make impossible any ideal of the the sexual relationship... [and some other random crap]!"

    Frankly, I think that's a good thing. I'd like to see less emphasis on sexual (or romantic, or marital) ideals, and way more emphasis on how these things work for real people here in the real world. It'd be a lot more helpful.

  8. If I were a premarital counselor, there would be no marriages, because I would tell people the truth: at some point, you will hate the person you married. You will hate everything about them. You will hate the way they breathe. If you get past that, you'll be married 50 years, if not, well, better luck next time.

  9. I am mostly with Geds, I can look at a girl and know if I want to have sex with her or not. There are a few guys that I would say are hot, but still not thinking about having sex with them (sex with a guy just does nothing for me).

    - Personal Failure

    Do you mind if I quote mine this for my signature?

    On the subject of homo/hetero: I'm the latter, and I couldn't change it for a big bag of salami. And I don't even like salami.

    I know this because, in addition to most girls, I find girls that look 'guyish' attractive. I do [i]not[/i], however, find guys that look like girls, or any guys period, attractive. Pretty much blows Mr 'phobes argument out of the water, that.

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  12. (edit to correct a couple intolerable spelling errors)

    Stupid nonexistent Opposite Universe. It would have been so easy for me and Dave to find some awesome hot chick who didn't want her family to find out she had hetero urges. She could live with us and we would all pretend Dave was our nice, normal, guy-liking male roommate who just couldn't seem to find Mr. Right. And didn't look very hard for him.

    About the more interesting, living with people issue. Dad used to say, you pick your friends for their flaws, because people rarely have a problem tolerating the good things about one another. After nearly nine years of me and Dave living most of the time in each other's back pockets I'm pretty sure that's one of the key ingredients. Oh, and both people have to have lots of patience, plus a willingness to try very hard, plus the desire and ability to communicate desires and concerns without a lot of bullshittening. And some other stuff like forgiveness and humility and guts and forgiveness and flexibility and the ability to be emotionally vulnerable when terrified and a sense of perspective and forgiveness, too.

    At least that's how it seems to me so far.

    So really, being in a long-term relationship is a snap! It's so easy and foolproof and not at all likely to end in painful death or mortal woundedness I'm shocked everybody doesn't have one! Especially our good friend up there, Mr. Only The Intimate, Constant Personal Attentions Of Gorgeous, Sweet, Loving Jesus Prevent Me From Kissing Other Guys!

  13. I am kind of amazed that some of the other guys here can't find another guy attractive. That doesn't mean you want to do anything with them, but hey attractive is attractive no matter what sex they are. Sorry just amazed.

    It reminds me of after watching Watchmen. A few of my guy friends went on about how they showed Dr. Manhattan naked. I honestly hardly noticed it until it was pointed out to me. Yet, none of them complained about Malin Akerman being nude in it.

  14. um...

    you know, i stood out in Junior High, because all the girls i knew? they would "practise" kissing with each other. in 99.9% of the cases, it was just funny and giggly and then we'd talk about the boy who was being practised to kiss. i was the only girl who didn't practise, and i caught a fair amount of hell for it (for the record, no not any homophobic issues, PTSD issues. thanx)

    i can't even count the number of children i have caught, or have had friends catch, kissing each other in their elementary years.

    and yet, most of these people grow up to be straight (they have Issues, but those Issues stem from the hell they get when caught by Authority kissing a person of the same gender. i swear to you, two 9 year old boys practising kissing will get more punishment than a 16-year old boy will for violently raping a girl who is a stranger to him.)

    or was this just a thing that happened in California? (no... because my 13 year old niece was practicing kissing with her girl friends when she was 8...)


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