Friday, January 28, 2011

One of These Things Is Not Like the Other

Apparently, the Empire* will have to give mandatory analogy classes to the entire freakin' Earth, because if this happens after I'm in charge, the frenzied apologies will in no way delay the punishment to follow. Let's just say the author will receive a stunningly complete education on exactly how fast one must be to outrun 100 enraged badgers.

Here’s a comment left on Ari’s post about the Reel Love is Equal video:

“What you heterosupremacist tyrannical theocRATS need to do is take your Final Leviticus Solution to the Homosexual Problem hate-filled violence-inciting propaganda and shove it down your own throats and choke on it. Start by shoving this sign down your throats – the one displayed at last summer’s tyrannical theocRAT tour

Now, this normally wouldn’t have gotten past the censors due to all the name calling. However, I’d like to point out first of all that this sign is ridiculous. This is like small-scale bombing of abortion clinics and shouldn’t be condoned by either side.

Yes, that comment is exactly like a bombing. Well, a small-scale bombing. Of an abortion clinic. Not a large-scale bombing. Of a flower shop. Those would be entirely different.

Here are a few other things that comment is exactly like:

The Holocaust
The Lockerbie Bombing
The Vietnam War Moderately Well-Armed But Ultimately Futile Conflict
My ass

This post concludes with a self-satisfied nod to the civility of denying civil rights to Americans that makes me think that when the author looks in a mirror, she's shocked that that person is always in the bathroom with her at the same time. And they never say hello.

This is what I’m talking about. I can’t be the only one seeing this. In general, I’m seeing the SSM side to be nasty, hate-filled people. I’m just not seeing that on the OSM side. Why is that?

*Someday, I will be Empress of the Entire Freakin' World. Be sure to reserve your Cabinet position today! I really need a Cabinet Minister of Oddly Worded and Nonspecific Warnings About Behavior Everyone Should Already Know Is Foolish and Dangerous. (Really, who tries to blow dry their hair in the shower?


  1. What exactly do you have to do to be able to deploy 100 enraged badgers at a moment's notice? I'm not sure you'll have many applicants to head up the Ministry of Badger Wranglers.

  2. PF, you owe me a KEYBOARD , babe. I just spit diet cherry coca cola all over mine!!!!!

    Yeah, yeah, I know I should know better by now.

  3. I hesitate to ask this, but what is the "Reel Love is Equal" video? It sounds like porn.

    An enraged badger is an extraordinarily formidable opponent. I sure wouldn't want to cross one...

  4. so far as I know, I'm still your Grand General and Admiral Mythical Forces and Glitter
    but I'm not opposed to adding a new hat, after the Conquest, and becoming Cabinet Minister of Oddly Worded and Nonspecific Warnings About Behavior Everyone Should Already Know Is Foolish and Dangerous. Cuz, you know, I love writing weird things like that :D


Comments are for you guys, not for me. Say what you will. Don't feel compelled to stay on topic, I enjoy it when comments enter Tangentville or veer off into Non Sequitur Town. Just keep it polite, okay?

I am attempting to use blogger's new comment spam feature. If you don't immediately see your comment, it is being held in spam, I will get it out next time I check the filter. Unless you are Dennis Markuze, in which case you're never seeing your comment.

Creative Commons License
Forever in Hell by Personal Failure is licensed under a Creative Commons Attribution-NoDerivs 3.0 Unported License.
Based on a work at