There Is Nothing Glorious Here

"Oh, did I break your fingers? That's your fault, bitch. Shoulda listened."

God is love. God is grace. God is forgiveness.

God will slam your fingers in a car door and set your house on fire if you don't do what he wants.

God wants you to remain married to your abuser, and if you're very good, he'll kill the bastard for you.

Praise the great and wonderful creator who has so little to do with his time, he breaks fingers and sets stoves on fire in order to get one woman to wear skirts instead of pants.

So in the mean time I was wearing dresses when I would go out into public. I was at Sears and thinking of what a hypocrite I truly was...almost as if God was laughing at me. So I proceeded to shut my finger in the sliding van door..and yes I needed to go to the hospital and yes this cost over 2,000.00. The girls were hysterical and I was just dumbfounded as to why God would allow this to happen. Fast forward to a few months after I had been completely convicted to always wear skirt or a dress, and was doing so...I was cleaning the kitchen....pondering....what would be the big deal if I wore capri's while gardening???? I looked over and my oven was on fire. I had it on cleaning cycle and it was locked shut. I had forgotten the bread drying for stuffing from the night before. After my 16 year old son broke the latch and put it out with the fire extinguisher, the entire kitchen was now covered in soot. I immediately apologized, knowing it was my own fault.

That's . . . horrifying. That's worship of an abuser. It's not like god sent her a letter, "wear skirts or else", she had a "feeling" she ought to wear skirts. And when she didn't, stitches and soot. It's so sad, and, if you've ever read Foreskin's Lament (excellent book), you know it's not an uncommon view of god, a deity with little else to do with his time other than torment his powerless creations. And for this we should praise him. Because god is love. And broken fingers and fire.

I suppose it's unsurprising, given that view of god, that believers often see nothing wrong with women being abused. God does it, why shouldn't husbands?

The only Biblical recourse for a horrible marriage, or any marriage for that matter, is death. If your husband is an abusive, mean, hateful, fill-in-the-blank jerk in spite of you doing your best as a wife, God can kill him whenever He wants to. If he is still alive, God must want you to still be married to him. A wife could pray and fast for her husband/marriage, and for the kids to turn out right in spite of marital problems. If nothing else, it will be a great lesson for the kids, who hopefully will grow up and make wiser and more careful choices regarding their future spouse, rather than learning that marriage can be dissolved at a whim.

That's right, if you pray hard enough, god will kill your abusive spouse. Unless your abusive spouse kills you first, but, hey, them's the breaks. And if you pray even harder, your children, unlike all the other children of abusers, won't be affected at all.

If you just pray hard enough. And do everything god tells you to do. And interpret those feelings just right.