Tuesday, July 7, 2009

Teh Evul, It's Everywhere!

fundamentalism, fundy, christian, rod of asclepius, star of life, cornutus, starbucks
I do love the fundys for their amusing tendency to embrace any conspiracy theory that floats by. Today we learn that Starbucks and Paramedics are Teh Evul.

This here is another signs of the time! Starbucks, hmm doesn't seem harmless enough does it? Well when you do research you find, its a depiction of the pagan sex goddess Ishtar, Ashteroth, and false god with many names.But see though in this dark world, you see the Evil One's signs all around us. But something we can always look for is...

For one thing, it would be helpful to look at the old Starbucks logo, which is clearly a mermaid or a siren. She is also bare breasted, complete with nipples, which explains why the logo was changed when Starbucks went national. Sorry, fundys, but I'm not worshipping Ishtar when I buy a Cinnamon Dolce Latte. mmmmm . . . cinnamon dolce latte . . .

The Brazen Serpent, which is often found some where around or on the Paramedics or Firefighters. It means safety, and that is exactly what Jesus did. He was similar to the Brazen Serpent, as too when we look too him we are healed of our wickedness and sins. It's amazing, how when this world seems so of the Devil himself. There are these little signs God shows us throughout the world.

Wtf do paramedics have to with healing wickedness and sin? And yes, in Christianity, snakes represent evil, starting with the snake in the Garden of Eden (which had legs, which sounds like a lizard to me, but whatever), but in Greek and Roman mythology, not so much. I mention Greek and Roman mythology, because that's where the snake on a stick comes from. It's called the Rod of Asclepius, and is explained thusly by Cornutus, a first century philosopher:

Asclepius derived his name from healing soothingly and from deferring the withering that comes with death. For this reason, therefore, they give him a serpent as an attribute, indicating that those who avail themselves of medical science undergo a process similar to the serpent in that they, as it were, grow young again after illnesses and slough off old age; also because the serpent is a sign of attention, much of which is required in medical treatments. The staff also seems to be a symbol of some similar thing. For by means of this it is set before our minds that unless we are supported by such inventions as these, in so far as falling continually into sickness is concerned, stumbling along we would fall even sooner than necessary.


The six pointed star surrounding the Rod of Asclepius is called the Star of Life and represents

the six main tasks executed by rescuers all through the emergency chain:

Detection – The first rescuers on the scene, usually untrained civilians or those involved in the incident, observe the scene, understand the problem, identify the dangers to themselves and the others, and take appropriate measures to ensure their safety on the scene (environmental, electricity, chemicals, radiation, etc.).

Reporting – The call for professional help is made and dispatch is connected with the victims, providing emergency medical dispatch.

Response – The first rescuers provide first aid and immediate care to the extent of their capabilities.

On scene care – The EMS personnel arrive and provide immediate care to the extent of their capabilities on-scene.

Care in Transit – The EMS personnel proceed to transfer the patient to a hospital via an ambulance or helicopter for specialized care. They provide medical care during the transportation.

Transfer to Definitive care – Appropriate specialized care is provided at the hospital.


I think the problem these fundys are having is the mere mention of any culture or tradition other than their own. A representation of sirens is evil because sirens are part of Greek mythology. The Rod of Asclepius is evil because it is taken from nonchristian belief, and the Star of Life is evil because it's not a cross. Fundys are intrinsically intolerant of anything, even harmless corporate logos, that is different. That's really sad.

13 comments:

  1. I have actually heard the Starbucks thing before, and I just love it. It is so irrational, just like all these claims that big chains are secretly pagan or satanic. I don't know any Satanists, but I know pagans aren't usually together enough to run any kind of company.
    The paramedic thing is new to me but not suprising. And it's sad when that level of intolerance isn't suprising.

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  2. Yeah, pagans are like atheists: they're aren't too many of us, and getting us to agree on anything is like herding cats.

    Though if there is some secret pagan plot to take over the world, remember I was nice to you.

    And I'd make a great Empress of the New Pagan States of America.

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  3. Oh boy, you linked to Rapture Ready...

    Every time somebody links to the RR boards, I have to look around the other forum topics. These people scare me, yet I cannot look away.

    Starbucks a minion of evil? I suppose Apple Inc. is evil for using a logo of the fruit, from the "tree of knowledge of good and evil", that Adam and Eve took a bite of.

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  4. "I suppose Apple Inc. is evil for using a logo of the fruit, from the "tree of knowledge of good and evil", that Adam and Eve took a bite of."

    Now that you mention it....

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  5. and the bite is already gone, which clearly represents man's evil state after the fall!

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  6. Christian intolerance is why they tried to wipe out the non-Christians of the ancient world (aka "pagans") And they're still looking for their boogeyman under every sign and symbol that isn't Christian. As for the snakes, heh, Patrick tried to clear out old Ireland of them. (Psst, they weren't literal snakes, they were talking about the non-Christians faithful to their gods and ways). And guess what...we're still here. (:

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  7. In Seattle I was surrounded by these logos, but never titillated until the Tians started squawking. Good history here. Once I noticed it, I thought it was pretty cool to get your fix of nourishment and solace by putting your lips on a naked woman's crotch.

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  8. I'm surprised you could even parse the original post (or whatever it was). There's no English to be found in that jumbled morass of letters...

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  9. wow, i didn't even realize i'd become fluent in written fundy.

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  10. I was like the "brilliant" posters on that forum. My radar was always on the lookout for signs of evil enmeshed with everyday stuff. I thought the Bible instructed me to do that in Ephesians 6.

    11 Put on the full armor of God so that you can take your stand against the devil's schemes.
    12 For our struggle is not against flesh and blood, but against the rulers, against the authorities, against the powers of this dark world and against the spiritual forces of evil in the heavenly realms.

    Thank "God" I am no longer deluded. These days I appreciate the art involved in creating a logo instead of looking for hidden evil.

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  11. Um, I'm fluent in fundy.

    You're apparently fluent in whack job. Maybe you should spend less time at Rapture Ready...

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  12. I'm fluent in Fundy...

    I was taught growing up that the snake around the pole came from Numbers 21:4-9 and since god used the serpent on a pole to heal the rebellious Israelites, it was a sign of god's healing power. Now on an ambulance near you.

    "Then the LORD sent venomous snakes among them; they bit the people and many Israelites died. The LORD said to Moses, "Make a snake and put it up on a pole; anyone who is bitten can look at it and live." So Moses made a bronze snake and put it up on a pole. Then when anyone was bitten by a snake and looked at the bronze snake, he lived"

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