Friday, April 2, 2010

Happens Often

The beginning of pretty much every video game. Here's your nearly useless weapon. What, those guys that want to kill you? Yeah, they'll have rocket launchers.


  1. Video game? That's my firk ding blast career!

    "Okay, we need this project done. It's important. It's also urgent. And it has to look great and do all this neat stuff. No, you can't have a budget for this. Just work with what you have."

  2. Yeah, we need you build a global communications system- we have room in the budget for a rock and a dead bee. Good luck!

  3. Assassin's Creed 2 at least assumed you still had all the abilities from the first game, if not necessarily the equipment. Of course, sometimes the fun of the Assassin's Creed series was killing people with the least powerful weapon.

  4. I don't even play video games, and I was guffawing over that site for a good half hour yesterday. So clever.

  5. Yeah, but they usually hide a variation of the humble chainsaw on you. The universe definitely CAN be saved with a 42" Husqvarna

  6. you little liars do nothing but antagonize...

    and you try to eliminate all the dreams and hopes of humanity...

    but you LOST...


    Einstein puts the final nail in the coffin of atheism...



    atheists deny their own life element...



  7. Now kill 10 rats in Ms. Somebody's basement...

  8. Off topic, but you really have to see this:

    It makes me want to break things...

  9. Isn't that the same random crap - I mean really, word for word - that davmab11 posted on his last drive-by?

    And, um, if we lost (was this a sports match?), then why are you bothering to come rant at us? I mean, surely if what we have to say is meaningless and ineffective, there's no need to respond to it, right?

    Also, what the hell is a "life element"? I don't recall seeing that on the periodic table...

  10. Video Games! I make them as a hobby, so I've learned a bit of the theory.

    What you refer to is pretty much the Video Game Sorting Algorithm of Weapon Effectiveness: namely, awesomeness of weapon is inversely related to how far you are into the game when you get it.

    It exists for a reason: if you start with awesomesause weapons then you don't get excited or have any reason to try out other weapons as you pick them up later in the game. A few games manage to subvert it, though: the Halo games, or FEAR, for example, base their normal weapons on tactical situations rather than gradually increasing their all-round effectiveness, and provide seperate "heavy weapons" with limited ammo to get excited about.

    I like the Need For Speed series way of doing things. Here's a nice car, you've got a couple minutes to drive it before we total/steal/impound it and you'll have to buy a Volkswagon Golf. :)

    PS: "you little liars do nothing but antagonize... "

    Oho! The irony is strong with this one.


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