Friday, September 11, 2009

A Christian Comic: Final Fantasy Meets Rock Band


comic, christian, safe sex, homosexual, music
The Truth for Youth produces Christian comics of such awesome hilarity that I think the author/artist should get some sort of award. Seriously, look at that picture from "Wasted Words: The Truth About Secular Music". Clearly, the designers of Final Fantasy have gotten together with the designers of Rock Band and this was the result. The lyrics were obviously taken from a rejected song written by the Maynard of Tool after a week long ecstasy binge, and someone's been spending a little too much time with the lolcatz (KEWL!*).


The comic only gets better from there with such classic lines as "I should have listened in bible study!" and "Maybe I'm [at the show] to learn deeper truths".


Born That Way: The Truth About Homosexuality has the standard "gays don't deserve civil rights, it's a choice, blahblahblah", set the exciting atmosphere of a riot- complete with tear gas and flying boulders.


Passes and Plays: The Truth About Safe Sex includes the high school football star, the slutty cheerleader, lies about STDs and birth control, and the instant classic line: "Baby, we'll be doin' more than talkin' later! I'm gonna huddle on your line of scrimmage and go for the extra point! Haw Haw**!"


Fail so awesome it's a win.





*Seriously, who speaks lolcat?


**It appears that Christian comics are required to include that laugh.

7 comments:

  1. What, no mention of their evolution comic "Somebody's Making A Monkey Out of You!"?

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  2. Holy crap! I love that when our heroic Christian discovers his little brother has disappeared from a rock concert, his first words are "I'm outta here!" Yeah, don't bother notifying security, or calling the cops, or your parents. I'm sure your brother just felt God telling him to flee from the eee-vil music... without telling you... yeah.

    Also, I protest the insult to Final Fantasy! Cleary, "Madonna Dahmer" is meant to be a Naruto villain...

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  3. I've found that when a writing has to proclaim that it's the "truth" about something, it's usually not.

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  4. And ceiling cat did look upon it and many lulz were had.

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  5. Oh some quick mathematical awesomesauce, in the safe sex one. The stat kid says 59% of the cheerleaders have hooked up with the quarterback. Since 59 is a prime number, then the school has to have at least 100 cheerleaders. That is the only way to get 59% with a whole number.

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  6. that made my brain bleed. and i only read the music one.


    why must they make BabyDenelian cry? that *worse* than making BabyJesus cry, because i am RIGHT HERE crying!

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  7. Defintion: Fractal wrongness - Being wrong at every scale of resolution. Your "fail so epic, it wins" reminded me of the phrase, and so I had to go find a Demotivator for you. Here, present time - http://web.mit.edu/tarvizo/Public/fractal-wrongness.jpg

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Forever in Hell by Personal Failure is licensed under a Creative Commons Attribution-NoDerivs 3.0 Unported License.
Based on a work at foreverinhell.blogspot.com.