I have regrets. You can't get to age 5 without regrets. You know what I don't regret? Being powerful, active and involved in my own sexuality and sex life.
I didn't "give away" my virginity, I enjoyed the first time I had sex. Sure, it was akward and painful at first, and exciting and fun. I've said no to a few people in my time, and I've never "given in" to anyone's demands to have sex, either. I've never had sex in order to be loved or keep a man. I have had sex because I wanted to. I've had sex with a man I had no intentions of ever seeing again. I've used condoms and been tested for AIDS*.
My point is that it's my body, my life and my choice. Every choice I've made, I made, and I've owned it. I've owned the good and the bad, and let me tell you, if you want to be satisfied with yourself as a person, if you want to like yourself, owning your decisions is crucial. If you want to stop being the victim of your own life, you have to make our own damn choices.
So it really pisses me off to see girls exposed to this kind of crap from the candie's foundation.
91: The percentage of teens who think it's important to get a strong message that they should wait to have sex.
76: The percentage of teens who wish the media showed the consequences of sex more.
75: The percentage of teens who don't thinks it's embarrassing to admit to being a virgin.
60: The percentage of teens who wish they'd waited longer to have sex.
First of all, I can't figure out where these "facts" come from. Have these teens never seen the Lifetime Channel? How about Bristol Palin? Who doesn't know the consequences of . . . oh, right, people who haven't had sex ed. Okay, then, what does candies have for teens to help them be strong, independent owners of their own existence?
A tank top with a slogan across the breasts, involving the word "sexy" in bright pink. That sound? That's my forehead repeatedly slamming into my desk.
Here's the advice I give all the girls in my family. If you're not sure you should be having sex, you shouldn't be. And that applies equally the first and the millionth time you have sex. If you're too embarrassed to buy condoms, you're not ready to have sex. If you can't deal with the possible consequences of sex, i.e., an unplanned pregnancy or an abortion, you're not ready to have sex, and that applies to 16 year olds and 40 year olds alike.
It's your body, own it.
*Actually, having had a blood transfusion prior to 1979, I've had lots of AIDS tests. Like 15 of them. Oh, and at least that many Hep C tests.