And the Nobel Prize for Fail Goes to . . .

pic link

This guy! Somehow, I ended up on a website devoted to fundamentalist Christian polygamy (not FLDS, evangelical. I think. Anyway, I didn't see anything about Smith having many wives.) where I happened upon a screed on patriarchal gender roles being based in genetics. I don't have any great understanding of genetics, but you don't have to in order to see the fail here.

Adam was made for GOD's own pleasure.

and now I'm thinking of yhwh as some sort of ethereal pervert.

I would not pervert the scripture but I implore the reader to consider that Eve was taken out of Adam and that in the beginning, the Adam contained the genetic material for both the Adam and the Eve. Adam was certainly a different sort of creature at that time, having within his body, the material for both the male and for the female that was necessary to initiate procreation: (Y, X, X, X).

Um, men always have . . . well, let me put it this way, a) men make both X and Y sperm. So every man can produce both male and female children, but not (b) without an egg to combine with and a woman to incubate the resulting fetus. interestingly, while men cannot reproduce without women, women can theoretically reproduce without men, Parthenogenesis, though I don't know that that's ever been proven to have happened in humans.

Now GOD saw fit from the beginning to separate the flesh from the flesh to make ADAM (Y, X) and EVE (X, X). Notice then that concerning the flesh, The Man has a measure of that substance in his being that GENETICALLY is rendered FEMALE. In this respect it can be said that a Man most certaily has a "female side" or quality about him.

I think what he's saying here is that men, because the sex chromosome set contains both an X and a Y, it is half female, which means that our erudite fundy has never seen what the rest of our chromosomes look like. Look at the picture above: all the chromosomes, except for the Y, are in the shape, more or less, of an X. Therefore, men have 23 female chromosomes and one male chromosome? that seems to be what he's saying. it's ridiculous, but it's what he's saying.

This is further verified by the fact that men have nipples. Do men suckle their young?

See, men and women are 99.7% the same. (depending upon how you're measuring things.) that's going to account for a lot of similar structures, including nipples. and, men can lactate. Male lactation generally doesn't happen on its own, but yes, men can suckle their young. or breastfeed.

Eve, on the other hand, has a double measure of the FEMALE chromosome, the X.

actually, as proven above, she has 1/23 more female than men, if my female you mean X, which I think you do. So, even using crazy fundy's logic, women are only 4% more female than men.

She does not have a "male" side. She is completely unable to "get in touch with her male side" except she joins to a man. Potentially, men have a better chance of knowing what it means to be FEMALE than a woman is capable of knowing what it means to be MALE.

okay, in the sense that it's hard for me to imagine what being a man must feel like in our misogynistic, patriarchal rape culture, men are not a different species. most of being a man is like most of being women, because we're all being human. he seems to think i'd have an easier time relating to an aboriginal woman in Brazil, living as her ancestors have for thousands of years, then relating to an American male of my socioeconomic group. That's total bullshit.

Now this scientific truth is continually being swept under the rug by EVOLUTIONISTS and SECULAR HUMANISTS because it totally dispells the religion of their perverse theories and casts down all the idols and icons of their IDEOLOGY.

yes, you caught us. it's the agenda. the perverse idols of the [insert minority group here] agenda. it's not, you know, science. or reality.

How dare a man say he understands what it means to be FEMALE!!!

dude, I am female and I'm not that pissed off about it. for the most part, men do know what it's like to be female because they are human and we are, too. now, if you want to know some of the finer details of being female in a particular culture, you'll need to talk to some females of that culture, but we're not some alien life form.

But the record remains written in the cell of every human being. A man definately has the capacity to understand a measure of this human condition, whereas the woman has no capacity in her flesh for understanding what it means to be male.

Oh, I see, the human condition is the male condition which women cannot understand. because we're not human.

This was GOD's own grande design.

grande? as in large?

Many scientists as a result have turned to CREATIONISM for answers because of these findings.

really? name them. Ken Hamm is not a scientist and neither is Ben Stein.

They are scoffed at and mocked by their peers but the record and the account found in the DNA of all animals continues to support these findings.

No, it doesn't.

But Mr. Fundy is all about the understanding, you see.

Wherefore, as MEN, we must be forgiving of WOMEN in their inability to understand us. They do NOT have a "male" side. GOD has given us men a measure of ability and some capacity to understand women, but it does not work the other way.

we're stupid like that. like dogs, only less furry.

Fortunately, both genders have a measure of "common ground".

99.7% common ground. It's a lot of common ground.

That said, a man will never understand what in means to be fully female in the flesh. He can only imagine. He cannot know. Men can appreciate beauty, flowers, butterflies, pretty things without being effiminate. That is also why men can appreciate women; but how can a woman appreciate that which makes him a man except she join with him in the flesh?

so, men can enjoy pretty things, but women can't understand . . . stuff?

That spirit has managed to corrupt and to pervert the flesh. Today, even our genetics are breaking down. In Man's knowledge of biology and zoology he has scrambled to preserve his DNA but it is a losing battle. Fortunately, GOD has shortened the days that would have led to Man's complete demise; but already we see in nature the result of this genetic breakdown not only in humans, but in all living things that have breath. The old 'carbon copies' are wearing out... The code is not replicating properly anymore... There are blanks and gaps in the genome... Mutations are also becoming increasingly common and genetic anamolies are on the increase. The corruption of our genetics began in the garden and as a result all creation is compromised.

None of that is happening. our DNA is not breaking down, nor is the DNA of anything else breaking down. it's like he watched the X-Men movie and confused it with the Bible and science. only, you know, without Hugh Jackman in tight, black pleather. totally missed the point of the movie, dude.

We've Got You- But Not for Long

I figured out where the Puritans went- they've become the Jehovah's Witnesses. (Whom I have seen on my front porch 4 times in the last 3 weeks. At some point I'm going to get cranky with them.)

Really, all that work to get you to join the club and you wouldn't believe the list of things you can be kicked out for! It pretty much boils down to "whatever you're doing immediately before you piss somebody off." Religions are wonderful for creating bizarre and numerous rules everyone will eventually break, aren't they?

Adultery (sexual intercourse with a person other than your marriage mate), includes;

• abandoning wife and eloping with another woman
• planned adultery to break Scriptural marriage ties
• remarriage without Scriptural permission
• polygamy
• dating a person not legally divorced

Dating a person not yet legally divorced is most certainly not adultery. Also, is abandoning one's husband and eloping with another man acceptable?

Associating with disfellowshipped people including;

• friends - ks91-E p.103, w81 9/15 pp.25-6, w55 10/1 p.607
• family - ks91-E p.103

Was your mother kicked out? Your son, your twin sister, your dying uncle? Too bad, you can't ever see them again!

• Blood and blood transfusions
• Drug use
• Drunkenness
• Dishonest business practices
• Employment violating Christian principles
• working for any religious organization
• working in a gambling institution
• selling tobacco -
• contract work at a military establishment

So, can you sell alcohol? Also, working for any religious organization? Doesn't someone work at the Watchtower?

Fornication it-

• bestiality
• incestuous marriage
• artificial insemination
• sexual abuse of children

One of these things is not like the other.

Greediness, this in used to include;

• gambling ks91-E p.95
• extortion ks91-E p.95, w89 1/15 22, it-1 p.789
• greed in relation to bride-price: w98 9/15 p.25

Wait, what? Bride-price? O_o

Obscene speech

Parents condoning immorality

Political involvement, including voting or holding a political card in Malawi Therefore Jesus, knowing they were about to come and seize him to make him king, withdrew again into the mountain all alone.

Porneia. "It includes oral and anal sex or mutual masturbation between persons not married to each other, homosexuality, lesbianism, fornication, adultery, incest, and bestiality."

• • Uncleanness
  • • sexually 'perverse' practices within marriage, such as oral and anal sex
    • heavy petting and breast fondling
    • touching of sexual parts

Fuck! I'm out! I'm guessing "parents condoning immorality" means not beating your gay child half to death. Porneia is a new one on me. Isn't lesbianism included in homosexuality? I also enjoy any list that puts masturbation on the same level as incest and bestiality. Ooo, and voting. That's of the Devil.

Also, how do they breed? Maybe that's why they have to recruit so heavily- if you can't touch sexual parts, you can't impregnate/be impregnated, and artificial insemination is out . . . so, no baby JWs. Brilliant!

Hey, maybe I could just tell the JW Grannies that keep visiting me that I "like fucking female donkeys while smoking cigarettes and playing blackjack in a voting booth." That should keep them away!

Mild Case of Death Healed in Dallas

No, really. That's what it says at the Elijah Challenge's website: Dead Woman Raised Back to Life in Dallas. I can't tell exactly what the Elijah Challenge is, they may be faith healers or people who train faith healers. The About Us page includes a link entitled Becoming a False Prophet. But I want to know more about that dead lady in Dallas.

Jay Bartlett received Elijah Challenge Training through online teachings and reports. He wrote:

"Just wanted to send a praise report as you had a critical part in this (as your online teachings and reports equipped me). I recently had the honor to raise a young lady from the dead in Austin, Texas.

Four times I had to bring back a young lady from the dead (she had no pulse, her body was limp, and she had stopped breathing and was cold). The demons were within a young lady who had traveled with her father to Austin to receive freedom from the demons that were tormenting her life. The first spirit that surfaced was a spirit named "Blasphemy." He was quite aggressive and violent. It took three men to hold her. He spoke in different demonic languages, criss-crossed her eyes, disfigured her body, manifested various burning smells within the room, exhibited supernatural power, and was extremely blasphemous (as it repeated blasphemy in a Germanic-like accent*). We expelled hundreds of these spirits.

Then "Destroyer" surfaced and was entirely different and a higher level demonic entity that which literally put her to death at least 4 four times during the deliverance–--no pulse, no breathing whatsoever, her body cold and limp, and no life. As you can imagine, the lady's father was frantic (but strong in Jesus) when he saw her dead–--she was gone. But with the commands in the name of Jesus we spoke life and raised her back to life. I breathed in her life, via her mouth, the life of the Holy Spirit and she was revived (like the prophet Elijah in the Old Testament). In each instance when she was in the state of death I had to breathe life in her. Jesus answered our prayers and raised her from the dead back to life!"

I should probably call the NRC, because crazy that nuclear probably needs a permit from a nuclear regulatory agency.

*Maybe she was just a Jäger. They were created by Vlad "the Blasphemous" Heterodyne, after all.

Slightly Less Crazy, But Not By Much

I grew up Catholic, so I suppose I shouldn't find discussions of demons as actual, real forces in the world as bizarre as I do- I mean, there are people within the RCC whose business cards read "Fr. Smith, Exorcist"- but the average Catholic does not spend a great deal of time thinking about Satan/demons. Contrast with evangelical christians who, I swear to you this is literally true, blame Satan if traffic is bad or their computer gets a virus. (Really. Get yourself onto Rapture Ready's message board and check out the prayer requests, half of which are desperate pleas to pray the demon out of the drippy faucet.)

Hence, we get this testament to crazy:

In the 20-plus years he has known Christ, Brady Boyd has never been to a megachurch where
demonic spirits was discussed.

And Boyd, who is currently senior pastor at New Life Church in Colorado
Springs, considers it a "big, big, big" topic that needs to be talked
about.

. . .

For Boyd, the existence of demons is very real. He recalled a time when his
young son, Abram, had "intense night terrors" (nightmares). They kept Abraham
and Boyd up at nights regularly. After recognizing that there was "a spiritual
element attacking" his son, Boyd prayed a "short, emphatic, decisive prayer"
calling on the name of Jesus. The "night terrors" stopped, he said.

The only thing that could be more horrifying than night terrors would be being told by your parents that the cause of your night terrors is Satan. If that's not abusive, I don't know what is.

One of my nieces suffered from night terrors. They're not uncommon, they require no treatment and they are horrifying. I will never forget seeing my niece, I think she was 3 at the time, screaming for her mother in absolute, unadulterated terror while her mother held her and begged her to see that she was there. My niece had no memory of the event once she actually woke up.

There is nothing psychologically or physically wrong with a person who has night terrors. It's a quirk of the sleep cycles. They sure as hell aren't caused by Satan. As I said above, night terrors tend to go away on their own. Generally, night terrors in children don't last more than a few weeks, and almost all children outgrow them before adolescence. Prayer didn't make Mr. Boyd's son better, time did. And I really cannot get over how abusive it is to tell someone that Satan caused their passing sleep disorder.

It does get crazier:

"A lot of the counseling I do at New Life Church could be settled if we
just had a culture where when a
thought came to you we had a sensitivity, an awareness that it's not from God.
If we just repent of it ... then adulterous affairs would stop, all the things
wrecking families would stop," he said. "It all just starts with a
thought."

That's right. Adulterous affairs aren't symptoms of complex psychological, personality and relationship disorders that need to be addressed and dealt with, you just need to think happy thoughts. Let me know how that works out for you.

These People Are Dangerous

vatican, swiss guard, crazy,
Whenever I see the Swiss Guard, I realize the Vatican is a really freakin' weird place. That's the Vatican military. Those men are dangerous. And dressed like a cross between an acid trip and a gay pride parade.

Date to Save

jesus, dating, christian, religion, bible, crazy,
Hat tip to Beamstalk for tipping me off to this!

While there is the possibility that Date to Save is a Poe, I'm going to approach this as if it isn't, because frankly, it's more fun that way.

Hello, my name is Tamara! As you can probably tell, I'm a Christian woman who loves Jesus Christ and cares for all humans, even the wicked. this is the first paragraph on the main page. how the fuck could i possibly tell that? I'll grant you "woman", since "Tamara" isn't generally a man's name, but the rest? What you probably don't know is that I'm hot. good for you. My picture below isn't really that good. yeah. I want to use my beauty for GOD, and want to encourage Christian women (my sisters in Christ) to do the same, according to the Great Commission. apparently, i missed that part of the bible.

So, I created this web page for information regarding the calling of Missionary Dating. You know what the first thing I thought was, right? you should. honestly, i cannot hear the word "missionary" without having a really graphic fantasy about [censored]. where were we? First of all, it helps that you're good looking. i am? thanks! Romans 12:1 says "to offer your bodies as living sacrifices." ummm . . . Since our bodies are the temple of the Holy Spirit (1 Cor. 6:19), it makes sense that we should use our beautiful bodies to glorify HIS name, the Holy Spirit will work the strongest since He's in our body, right? frankly, that whole passage was distracting. and possibly sexually explicit. That's the best position to be in! that's what she said!

Not only can we date hot guys (as only hot Christian girls could do what?), but hopefully we can lead them to God and help them get saved them from the burning fires of Hell. O_o I've outlined a few tips to help you get a date off to the right start, step-by-step. is this the leading to a really weird porno? Jesus saves through hooking up with cute heathen guys! jesus hooks up with cute heathen guys? i think i may need to reread the bible.

10 Christian Dating Tips for Effective Missionary [censored] Dating

1. If he tells your that you are hot...Tell him God made you hot. i usually go with "thank you" (the proper way to take any compliment), although "you're hot" is generally a lame compliment. honestly, you can't think of one thing in particular to compliment me on? you can't come up with one interesting adjective?

2. If he wants to hold your hand...Give him a Bible. not hot.

3. If he tries to get closer...Tell him the Holy Spirit is wooing him. this wins non sequitur of the week award.

4. If he asks to pay for dinner...Remind him that Jesus also paid a debt He did not owe! no, this wins non sequitur of the week award.

5. If he reaches his arm around you...Tell him that nobody will ever be as close to you as Jesus is.(or ask him if you instead could "lay hands" on him in prayer) apparently, this guy likes crazy chicks, because if he stuck around through 1, 2, 3 and 4, and then tried to put his arm around you, he's either way into the crazy, or he's planning on dropping a roofie in your drink later.

6. If he tries to kiss you...Remind him that a kiss killed your Savior.(and you're not ready to "speak in tongues") first off, really bad pun. secondly, no a kiss did not kill jesus, though that kind of thinking is sure to kill your sex life. a kiss betrayed jesus, crucifixion killed him. (assuming the story is even vaguely true.)

7. If he asks to come inside... O_o Ask him if he has asked Jesus to come inside his heart. thank you for making me picture the most disgusting sex act imaginable, involving your savior.

8. If he tells you he loves you...Tell him that Jesus loves him. i love the fact that you respond in ways that are only tangentially related to the conversation. it's like the crazy eights of conversation!

9. If he gets angry that you won't put out...Clarify to him that W.W.J.D. does NOT mean "Who would Jesus Do." and then suggest some serious therapy. hello, i'm clearly batshit insane, why would you want to fuck me?

10. After you dump him...Tell him that Jesus Christ will never leave or forsake him. because it's dating for christ, not treating other people with dignity and respect for christ. basically little miss hottie's strategy is to break her victims through emotional torture and general insanity and then, when they've finally given up all hope and are reduced to mere shells of their former selves, introduce them to jesus.

I Swear This Is Not a Poe- Part I

republican, conservative, prolife, oklahoma, crazy,
This is the Oklahoma (OK!) GOP Platform for 2009. No matter how much of a Poe it looks like, it is real. Seriously. No, really, it is.

I won't review everything, because quite frankly there's only so much I can take for the team, but I will highlight the truly nuclear stupid.

Under Statement of Principles:

4. God is the Author and Creator of life and that all human life, both born and unborn, should be protected. So, no atheists, no abortions, no stem cell research and probably no IVF. This sounds like the statement of principles of a church, not a political group, but Christianity has been conflated with patriotism and politics for a long time, so it's hardly surprising.

5. In traditional marriage consisting of one man and one woman. not much on the equality, either. hardly surprising.

6. It is the private sector and free market principles that best stimulate economic development rather than government subsidies or programs. not liking the stimulus, either. we don't call them "the party of no" for nothing.

7. Taxes collected at all levels of government should be used only for legitimate government functions, and those functions carried out efficiently so that tax rates may be kept as low as possible. I'm pretty sure we can all agree with that one, on its face, but way to claim that position as Republican.

9. It is the right of every parent to act in his or her children’s best interest including choosing the form of education, whether public school, private school, or home school. stop telling my children gays are human, too!

Their "constitution" has its own section just for families, that reads like a statement from om nom NOM.

Preamble:

Traditional marriage, consisting of one man and one woman, is designed to provide for each family member’s physical, emotional, financial, spiritual, and social well-being. Both parents are needed to support and encourage happiness, health, and a good education for their children,creating the next generation of citizens who are constructive members of society. Multigenerational families foster mutual respect and cooperation while providing support for extended family members and forming enduring relationships. We believe God is the Author and Creator of human life and that each individual should be treated with dignity and compassion. We insist that any candidate receiving money and/or support from the Republican Party shall affirm and promote the Pro-Life concept.

Do I really need to mock that for you?

next they make an unintentional argument for removing the government from all marriages, making the government's involvement limited to civil unions for everyone, and marriage an extra thing the religious can choose to add. i doubt they intended to do this.

We affirm the state’s recognition that marriage between one man and one woman is a covenant relationship, instituted by God, does anyone remember god instituting marriage? because i don't. it's not in the bible. god does not marry adam and eve, and while the ten commandmants do forbid adultery, marriage itself isn't mentioned. and they're not interpreting the bible. uh huh. not to be entered into casually are they proposing some sort of test to see who's serious and who's casual? yikes., and is fundamental to our very existence and survival as a nation. um, yeah. okay. Therefore, we strongly support a U.S. Constitutional amendment defining marriage as between one man and one woman. of course you do.

6. We believe that in order to encourage and protect family values, those promoting homosexuality or other aberrant lifestyles nice. homosexuality is found in nature all over the place, but it's aberrant. i suppose i should feel lucky they didn't use the word "sodomite"., should not be allowed to hold responsible positions over children which are not their own or over other vulnerable persons. wow. that could be interpreted to mean that gays, and people like me who support gay rights, would be barred not only from adoption and foster care, but from working at a day care, a school, a YMCA, a church, a nursing home, a hospital. that's nuclear crazy.

11. We believe marriage should not be entered into casually and should not be dissolved easily.Therefore, we call for states to repeal “no-fault” divorce statutes. back to the good ole days of airing your dirty laundry for all the world to see in order to get a divorce. this from the party of newt.

Wow. I haven't even gotten to Right-to-Life and Medical Ethics yet. This is definitely a multiple poster.

Sin is an alien that has no true rights.

religion, christian, christianity, atheism, atheist, democracy, theocracy, bible, god, jesus, judaism, muslim, pagan, heathen, crazy,
Sorry, Robert Lee at the Society for the Practical Establishment and Perpetuation of the TEN COMMANDMENTS has raised the bar for crazy with Things you should know*.

It sounds absolutely absurd for supreme court judges to vote on an issue. Either they are judges or voters. True judges judge, not vote. that is so awesome, it might be a Poe.

Never think you have the wrong book even if you pick up the Bible by mistake! well, if i want to find a phone number, i most certainly do have the wrong book.

What good is the poem,
What good is the rhythm and rhyme?
As long as they do not convey God's truths,
They are not worth a dime.

The industrial revolution in America helped greatly to destroy moral values in America. The factory system was developed not as a result of need, but from greed. Home employment employed everyone. But the factory, having destroyed home employment, cannot employ everyone. Thus unemployment was created by the industrial revolution. that's right, there was never, ever unemployment ever, in the world, prior to factories. because every single person was a farmer at all times. and soldiers never came home from war to find that there wasn't a job for them.

Who are heathens to comment on whether God exists or not; they don't know whether their own selves exist or not, or whether the life they live is truly real. um, yeah.

Every citizen of America has found cause to argue against democracy one way or the other, because it is not right for anyone. that would just be you. i'm fine with democracy.

I don't attend funerals. I've never attended one during my adult life. Whenever I am convinced that a person truly went to heaven, then you will see me at his funeral. that's right, nobody Mr. Lee has ever known, not a family member, nor a friend, has ever gone to heaven. heaven must be a very lonely place indeed.

One cannot have thoughts of a true GOD without actually thinking of the true God, because there is no true God other than the true God. In other words, one cannot imagine a true God without actually thinking of the true God. There are no imaginations of the true God apart from actually thinking of the true God. The true God is not a God of the imagination. and the award for circular reasoning par excelence goes to . . .

Those who would endeavor to properly straighten out the american society will have to forget about attending college or seminary and forget about a "degree", because once you have obtained a "degree," you will have become thoroughly incompetent and impotent to do anything truly worthwhile for america. ignorance isn't bliss, it's competance and erections!

Solomon quite obviously is not the one making judicial decisions in america. for quite a variety of reasons.

Middle-class blacks are foolishly frustrated that they still are, to some degree, prevented from serving satan as do whites. They will not be satisfied until they have the freedom to serve him equally. did i mention Mr. Lee is a racist?

Blacks have never understood how blessed it is to be outcasts in the american society. a really big racist.

It's LEGAL for boxers to break one anothers' noses, blacken one anothers' eyes, knock out teeth and try to give one another a final concussion which may result in death; but it's ILLEGAL to cock or dog fight. because humans have the mental capacity to choose this action, but birds and dogs do not.

Better is a dictator who rules every aspect of the lives of the people with true justice and righteousness, than a democracy wherein the people indulge in the evil and idolatrous freedom they desire. i wonder who Mr. Lee has in mind for the dictatorship?

All major news media in America is the main medium by which satan and his demons speak to the American public. The senators and congressmen are also the medium by which the people make their desires known unto satan, and one means by which satan answers their prayers. demons, demons, everywhere . . .

Demons cause more than one type of expression on the faces of the people whom they possess: There is the glassy-eyed look and stare of the epileptic; the feminine look in the male homosexual; the masculine look in the lesbian; the look of education and sophistication; the look of innocence and truth in the liar, etc... did I also mention Mr. Lee hates gays, epileptics and liberal elites?

Reading the Atlanta Journal and Constitution is seeing the world through the eyes of homosexuals.

America is the leading anti-Christian, anti-God, anti-Jesus Christ nation on earth. right ahead of Iran, well known for their love of jesus.

The musical "Beauty and the Beast" made by atheist homosexual heathens at Walt Disney is designed to subtly create tolerance in the foolish american society for BESTIALITY ! Mr. Lee isn't fond of Disney, either.


Has a person ever made you so angry you wished he was dead? Then why can't you feel and express that same fervency of anger towards true criminals such as atheists, pedophiles, homosexuals, murders, rapists and etc? It is likely that the people who made you so angry did not commit death worthy crimes in the society; but the people we have name have. What you should wish for these people is that the government put them to death. atheist=gay=pedophile=murder=rapist.

There is a time and season for every purpose under heaven. There was a time for blacks to fight for civil rights, but now it is time for them to fight against it as it pertains to gays. Mr. Lee isn't quite as racist as he is homophobic.

The corporeal Jews are looking for a "messiah" but they don't know where he will come from (John 7:27). Since the true Messiah, the Lord and Savior, Jesus Christ, came from heaven, but the Jews did not and do not believe in Him, and since Jesus is the only true Messiah, meaning that no other Messiah will come from heaven, then the messiah the heathen corporeal "jews" are looking for can only originate on cursed earth or descend out of hell. It is therefore plain to see who their messiah is. He is none other than the old serpent. is there a bigotry Mr. Lee does not embrace?

Every society will have groups that can be identified with prevailing social patterns and institutions. In america, such are the atheists and other pagans. But there are others who oppose and defy america's atheistic and pagan establishment. Yes, america has its critics and enemies. But the ever enduring group and most important are the few who are true Christians - rightly so. True Christians understand the heathenism of the american establishment and thus is unconvinced it is the best of all possible worlds. True Christians have serious reservations about america's morality and political philosophy. Don't worry my pagan readers, Mr. Lee didn't forget about you!

Americ! America! Please listen! Please do not let the likes of Ozzie Osburn get the victory and capitolize off you! Apparently, we were fighting Ozzy and I missed it!

I'm just going to stop here:

demo cracy ----- demo N cracy ----- DEMONCRACY. Now you know the origin of democracy. It is none other than SATANOCRACY

*found under the heading "Supporting Documents"!!1!!

Wow. Just Wow.

ten commandments, crazy, death, penalty, homosexual, rape, bestiality, incest, capital, euthanasia, infanticide, prochoice, prolife, abortion, birth control,
Daniel Florien, at Unreasonable Faith, reminded me of the Society for the Practical Establishment and Perpetuation of the Ten Commandments.



Daniel just did a post on the article "Exposing the Atheist", and I've done a couple on the SPEPTC, as well, so I went looking around the site to see if there was anything new to discuss.



All I have to say is that I clearly didn't look closely enough at this site the first time around.



Controlling the World's Population



by Robert T. Lee



The present world's population of people is said to be nearly 6 billion. It is expected to rise to 8.9 billion by 2030, and reach 10 to 14 billion by 2050. The largest increases are expected to take place in some of the poorer countries, such as Africa and southern Asia. I actually don't know if this is true or not, but it sounds about right, especially with the Pope running around telling people that condoms are Teh Evul.


In view of those projections, more and more attention is being placed on ways to control the world's population.


Some of the present methods proposed and practiced are: legislation restricting how many children a family can have, contraceptives, sterilization, sexual abstinence, permanent celibacy which would be different from sexual abstinence how?, deliberately induced abortions as opposed to accidentally induced abortions?, infanticide, euthanasia, homosexuality i'm pretty sure nobody is a homosexual purely for the sake of population control, delayed marriage, sterilization of the retarded which we could include under "sterilization", war as population control?!, fatal disease inducement upon certain portions of the human population see: what the eurpoeans did to the native americans and etc. "and etc."? uh, yeah.


Although demography draws its insight from several of the so-called intellectual fields, such as anthropology, biology, economics, history, medicine, sociology and statistics, so called intellectual fields? if none of the above are intellectual, what is? it is quite obvious that most of the ways proposed and being tried to control the human population is are blindness -ness, foolishness -ness, immoral and thus infringes upon the God-given rights of the weakest and most innocent of the human community. wait until you see what is seeing, wise, moral and doesn't infringe on rights.



There is a better and more sane way to control the human population without allowing immorality, the immorality of delayed marriage or sexual abstinence? without doing injustice to anyone wait for it. and while not seeking to discourage pronatalist prolife, i think. views among the human population. we don't really care about prochoice lemurs, after all.


Since the population of mankind is a "closed" population - no humans can migrate to and from earth, only the rate of births and deaths can increase or decrease the human population. what living thing on the planet would not qualify as "closed" under this definition? just curious.


Therefore, the way to control the population growth is through the increase of the human mortality rate by legitimate means. we're almost there. Not through the crimes of abortions, infanticide, euthanasia and etc; but through the automatic DEATH PENALTY for the broad spectrum of deeds that are high crimes in the sight of the true GOD. that's right kids, abortion, infanticide and euthanasia are crimes, but the death penalty for adultery is just and righteous. that's his moral answer to overpopulation: kill everyone. This principle of population control has never been addressed by demography. I wonder why? It is the cornerstone better than birth control! of proper human population control which the builders have rejected. i just can't see why.


Some of the high crimes which God requires the human society to vigorously odd use of an adverb enforce the death penalty upon are: blasphemy against the true God i'm dead; idolatry leigh at odins daughter, and denelian, dead.; breaking the Lord's day we're all dead; dishonor to parents every teenager to ever live, dead; murder; adultery according to the last study i saw, 40% of women and 60% of men would be dead; incest; homosexuality half the people i know dead; bestiality; rape not punishable by death in the bible. there are two punishments for rape in the bible: marrying your victim or paying her father; kidnapping what verse is that? god was fine with the israelites kidnapping virgins and turning them into sex slaves; seeking to destroy the righteous what?; putting to death the innocent i'm gonna need a bible verse on that one(such as putting innocent embryos and fetuses to death in abortions); seeking to overthrow God's appointed authority question Mr. Lee and you're dead, etc.

If this method of population control were ever enacted, we wouldn't have to worry about population control, because there would maybe 3 people left, and 2 of them would be in comas.

In order for the world community of humans to actually put this decorous someone needs a dictionary principle into practice, it must adopt the MORAL LAW OF GOD - THE TEN COMMANDMENTS as the supreme laws of the World community. boy am i glad that not only isn't the US a christian nation, but the world isn't christian, either.
This principle of controlling the population punishing everyone everywhere for everything until there isn't anyone left would positively affect the economic prosperity of nations by removing anyone making or spending money?, positively affect the health and increase the life expectancy of lawabidding citizens how? mouthy teenagers aren't the reason for cancer, properly educate the human race in fear i suppose, positively affect the family structure by removing all the families, overwhelmingly reduce crime, etc. actually, capital punishment has never been shown to reduce crime. in fact, capital punishment increases extremely violent crime. think about it: if you're going to get the needle anyway, you may as well go out in a blaze of glory. Every legitimate aspect of the human society would benefit greatly. if by "legitimate aspect" you mean "executioners", i suppose.

By adopting the TEN COMMANDMENTS as the supreme laws of the earth and properly administering them actually the ten commandments don't address bestiality, homosexuality, incest or rape, the true criminals - those worthy of death pretty much everyone, will be the ones put to death instead of the innocent. It is only right to focus on true criminals who commit high crimes of adultery and mouthing off to one's parents in order to control the world's population rather than focusing on the most helpless, innocent and weakest people of the human society. you know, by using birth control.

now that is some grade-A, prime cut crazy, there.

Taking the Crazy Train to Nutterville

crazy, religion, religious, jesus, miano, lawman, evangelical, evangelism, witness, testimony, god, christian, bible,
This guy lives in California:

Proclaiming the Law and the Gospel is not a right given to Christians by men. It is a command given to Christians by God. If you want to earn and exercise a right, go earn and exercise the right to die for Jesus Christ at the hands of the very people who insist you do not have the right to speak to them about the Way, the Truth, and the Life.

So, when did California start executing Christians for their belief? Yet again we have confirmation that what fundys want more than anything else is a return of the lions.

Fundy Reaction to Atheist Student Group

atheism, atheist, christian, christianity, campaign, religion, rapture, crazy,
The most common fundy explanation of atheists is that deep down we do believe in god, but our pride/love of sin/basic ignorance keeps us from worshipping him properly. This is incredibly silly, and unbelievably arrogant. Would any of these people even consider telling me what I think or feel about anything else? If I said that I love my husband, would they say, "No, you don't." If I said that I am terrified of spiders, would they say, "No, you just pretend to be arachnophobic."

I rather think not.

What if I said that christians don't really believe in god, they just pretend to, because it's popular? They're just going with the flow, following the path of least resistance, trying not to make waves. (Don't worry, I'm all out of cliches for now.) I would be lambasted, and rightly so. I cannot know another person's mind. I can guess from their words or actions, but in the end, I have to take their word for it.

On to what prompted my rant.

From the Rapture Ready message boards, we have First Were The Buses. Now Atheists Get a Student Society. (posted by MovinUp)

My immediate reaction to this, without even reading the article is "Well, yeah, we're citizens, too. If all the religious organizations can have student societies on college campuses, why can't atheists? (There really is no reason why not other than prejudice.)"

Every religion on campus has its student society, from the Christian Union to the Jedi Knights. Now the non-religionists atheists? it's certainly easier to type than non-religionists. will have theirs comma too. The National Federation of Atheist, Humanist and Secular Student Societies launches today to mobilise non-believers again, atheists. The "anti-God squad", as it is happy to be called, says it will fight for the voices of what it believes to be the majority of students to be heard on campus and further afield. probably not the majority, but hey, way to think positive. It is planning campaigns and events across the country to protest against religious privilege and promote the understanding of science. It has the support of some of the country's leading critics of religion: the scientist Richard Dawkins, the philosopher AC Grayling, and the Guardian columnist Polly Toynbee.The launch comes four months after a campaign for 30 London buses to parade the slogan: "There's probably no God. Now stop worrying and enjoy your life."The campaign, first mooted on the Guardian's Comment is Free site by comedy writer Ariane Sherine, began in response to evangelical Christian adverts on buses.entire article:http://www.guardian.co.uk/education/...tudent-society

I'm not sure how an atheist snuck onto the Rapture Ready message boards, but Omachi replies with: It's about time. Although, if it's anything like the Christian Union at my university, they won't me all militant and "God doesn't exist, you're a fool to believe in him". Hopefully anyway. I can't stand militant atheists, and I'm a atheist myself.
(Omachi's signature) Reality is that which, when you stop believing in it, doesn't go away. love the sig, and I agree with Omachi. I'm not all about defaithing people, I just want them to leave me alone.

BarbT tries for a pithy reply:
"It's about time." Nope, it's about eternity. I'm not even sure what that's supposed to mean. probably something about hell.

happy2serve: Hi Omachi
Sorry I have to quote you:"Reality is that which, when you stop believing in it, doesn't go away." just try disbelieving in gravity. you will indeed still fall.
God, even though some stop believing in Him, doesn't go away, even though our 'reality, ie. the physical world' will eventually go away. Atheists will find out during judgment day this is the truth. God bless. YOU WILL BURN IN HELL! have a nice day! we call this an appeal to consequences, and it's not a valid argument. besides, threatening someone with something they don't believe in is pointless. you may as well threaten to send a herd of tiny pink unicorns to prick me to death with their tiny, sharp horns.
And mods...sorry if this is tracking off course...I do apologize mod apologies seem to be all the rage on this board.

cocopea9052 (which really makes me wonder if "cocopea" without the numbers was taken) joins the appeal to consequences: Hum, well you know I suppose they can mobilize now if they so choose. But one day all "unbelievers" random sarcastiquotes! will mobilize, and it won't be on a bus, or on a school campus, it won't be at a Convention or Society meeting. where will it be, cocopea? It won't be to go cross-country and spread the word of "non-belief". But yes, they will all be mobilized, they will all stand together....and their worries over "if there is a God", will be put to a final rest, but uh.....I don't think they will be enjoying life...,.... great, she never tells me. apparently, all the atheists will move to iowa at some point, or something like that. if you're going to make an appeal to consequences, you ought to at least tell me what the consequences are.

bornagain123 gives us the standard fundy talking point re: atheism: Is it just me, or does anyone else feel sorry for these people? ah, the condescension. you can smell it from here. Really-it's NOT that they DON'T believe G-d exists, but it's that they CAN'T. and here we go. could you stop telling me what i think, please? i know exactly how i think, and i don't believe god exists. don't. do not. IOW-they're doing nothing more than Sticking Their Heads In The Sand! random capitalization to no apparent purpose. They may look happy and smiley on the surface, but deep down inside, you can bet that they are worrying their tails off! oh, noes! I don't have a tail- I musta done worried it right off!

happy2serve is also happy to play along: Yes, I do very much feel sorry for them. so sorry, that i revel in their eventual eternal punishment. Unfortunately, trying to explain the truth to the majority of them is difficult. trying to peddle your fairy tales to someone who doesn't want to hear them is difficult. and obnoxious. I wish they would come to Christ so they could be at peace. i am at peace. much more at peace than when i was trying, so very hard, to believe in what i didn't believe in. (i am no good at the cognitive dissonance.)

cocopea9052 joins the false pity parade: Actually, I feel sorry for them too, but woe to the adults & parents who are leading them astray, God is going to pour out his wrath on them for sure. and everyone else, from what I understand. I mean, I know college students are mostly over 18, but they are still young adults. young enough to vote and fight, not quite old enough to pick a religion. brought to you by the people who cheerfully accept professions of faith from preschoolers. If they were not raised in a Christian home, then off they go to college and they think this stuff is normal and acceptable.. it's like Teh Gay they are in fact proud of promoting equality, we're not supposed to be proud of that? what exactly are we to be proud of then? fighting for some ungodly cause... oh, Teh Gay etc. ..they become submerged in the secular world with little to fall back on... i'm not sure "falling back" on something is a big help when you are "submerged" they have no Christian values to fall back on or roots to return to. These kids are grown from parents who never embraced Christ. not "born of" or "raised by", but "grown from". that's a little odd. I also like the No True Scotsman. (if they become atheists, they must never have been Real True Christianstm, because Real True Christianstm don't become atheists.) The blind leading the blind....It is a lost generation no doubt. ummmm . . . I'm fairly certain most of the Lost Generation is already dead.

So, there you have it. If you want to know what I think, go find a Real True Christiantm and ask them.

Internet Wars!

farah, schlussel, wnd, blogger, crazy,
This is the bestest thing ever posted by the wingnuts at World Net Daily.

Irresponsible Accusations*

by Joseph my lips say no but my mustache says yes Farah

There's an Internet pundit out there in the blogosphere whose name I will not utter. Fortunately for you, I will utter it. Debbie Schlussel. (That only took me quite a lot of searching. Mr. Farah is absolutely determined that WND readers will not get the other side of the story.)

From her perch, the world revolves around her. If she writes something one day, she imagines millions actually read it. Seriously, for a minute there, I hoped he was talking about me. That would have been awesome!

She imagines we read it at WND, even though I have expressly forbidden my staff to visit her site because of her repeated, reckless, irresponsible accusations of theft of her ideas and ramblings. uh, apparently you and your staff do read it, or you wouldn't have known about what you write about next. protest too much . . . uh, much?

Last weekend, she apparently reported, contrary to widespread Internet rumors, that President Obama is not planning to bring Palestinian Gazans to the U.S. as part of the recent "emergency aid package." Good for her. She got this one right. but you never, ever, evah! read her site. ever.

Many days before she wrote this on her blog, however, I was in consultation with WND's Jerusalem bureau chief, Aaron Klein, about reporting this story. I told him the rumor mill was rife with the misinformation and it was time to set the record straight – which he did first two days before she wrote anything on her blog, and then again in WND a day after her report, which I have still never seen because I must follow my own edict never to visit her site. yet somehow, you know exactly what she said. it's a fuckin' miracle!

Nevertheless, even though Aaron Klein is on record revealing the truth about this story two days before her blog posting, she is insisting, in the most hateful, vile accusations imaginable (I know this only because third parties are sending me the material), that WND ripped off her report. whether or not mysterious "third parties" are sending you "material", you're still reading her writing, aren't you? which you never, ever, evah! do.

this goes on for about 8 more paragraphs, then we get this gem:

Now, why do I write an entire column about the reckless, irresponsible ravings of an unnamed blogger? that is a good question.

I do so because I will not give her what she most craves – attention and visibility. BWAHAHAHAHAHA! i never would have looked her up if Mr. Moustache hadn't written this article. Irony score! She works in relative obscurity, and I will not lift a finger to change that. well, except to write this article. and possibly others if she pisses me off again.

That totally made my day.

*I have no idea who's right and who's wrong in this situation. Moustache Farah's off his rocker, but Schlussel could be, too. I don't know. I am rather inclined to like anyone Farah spews this much venomous bile at, but that could be a mistake.

Every Time I Think I Can't Be More Offended . . .

some christian asshat proves that i can be.

(from the RaptureReady message boards) cbressler1976 has a great thought!: I have been upset about the innocent children in all of the fighting in Gaza....but this thought came to me....these little children that are dying would have been taught Islam and hate...this way they have a chance to go to heaven!! It's terrible that they are dying and my heart is sad....but when I was talking to God this thought came to me....the ones that are dying are going to be able to go to heaven....instead of growing up and following Islam...so, something good is coming out of this....

ok, do i need to explain how sick and offensive and disgusting and, and . . . GAH! this is? oh, poor little children, bodies torn apart, dying in pain, afraid and alone, but it's a good thing! it's fantastic! isn't god wonderful? if they had lived, they would have turned into filthy, dirty muslims. i'll say it again- GAH!

wvborn56 apparently shares in the OP's love of children torn apart and bleeding in the dirt: That is an excellnt point. It is always good to have an eternal perspective. on a long enough time line, asshole.

Very good thought, on the other hand their parents think they are with "allah" which is the arabic word for god. ARABIC-SPEAKING CHRISTIANS CALL GOD ALLAH. GET OVER IT. and enjoying 72 virgins. ok, it just got that much more offensive. and we started out with dead children being a good thing. there should be an award for this sort of thing. But we know they rest with Jesus. Too bad their kids can't tell them they are worshiping a fake god. The kids know more than the "teachers" of islam. i think every christian in the US should be required by law to write a letter of apology to the islamic world at large. every day.

mommytoa3rdgradeboy (does she change her screen name every year, or is he just really slow?) seems to think god is good in choosing natural disasters instead of shipments of bibles: Yeah, I know what you mean. I remember, at first, feeling soooo sorry for all the little children who had died in the tsunami (sp) in 04, I think???? but you know, not for the adults. they can just . . . um, well . . . go to . . . yeah. Then, it just hit me like a ton a of bricks--those little children, had they grown up, may never have come to know the Lord, and now they can be w/ Him. so, god couldn't just send over some missionaries, maybe a couple of boxes of bibles, some chick tracts, something? a 50 foot wall of water was the best option? i guess it is my moral duty to never have children, because then god would have to set pennsylvania on fire in order to protect them from being raised as atheists.

what's the fucking matter with these people, anyway?

Low Pressure Rapture System

The Rapture Index continues to fall! We've fallen 1 point to 155.

Craziest Freakin' Thing Evah!

Ok, this is so freakin' crazy, I don't really know where to start!

The End-Time Deliverance Ministry has a website with specific instructions on how to rid yourselves of demons. Really. They're serious about it (though it's a little hard to take the pink background seriously).

But, you may ask, where in the bible does it state that I have demons? (Probably you wouldn't ask that, or if you did, it would be about the 50th question on the list, but just play along, ok?) Here's the answer: For those of you who demand to see a Scripture before you can believe something, there are NO Scriptures that say YOU do NOT have demons. That should settle it!

Just let that sink in for minute.

Yes, you read that right.

There are also no scriptures that say that you are not satan, that I am not an alien and that god isn't a huge Fallout 3 fan. In fact, there are far more things that scripture doesn't speak on than things it does speak on . . . so feel free to believe anything at all. Flying Spaghetti Monsters for all!

You are a triune being - BODY, SOUL and SPIRIT. Your SOUL is your MIND, WILL and EMOTIONS. so i am a triune of a triune? my will is 11.11% of my being?

BODY - Christians can have a sickness/disease just like the unSaved. That's caused by demons (if not caused by other factors). If it weren't for the demons, I wouldn't have porphyria. If I follow the directions on this site, and I am not instantly cured of porphyria, then I'm just not a good christian. try this logic on your grandma if she gets cancer. i'm sure she'll appreciate it.

SOUL - Do you have a bad temper? no, actually i'm pretty zen. i don't feel a need to fill my life with anger and hatred. That's a demon. yeah, so if my husband leaves his dirty dishes on the counter, exactly 2" from the dishwasher, and i get a little pissy about it, that's a demon? at least i'm not hormonal. Is there mental illness in your family background? there's a reason i'm not procreating. That is a demon. again, when your mom gets hit with depression, tell her the problem is a demon. i'm sure she'll feel better immediately! Do you have trouble serving God? That's a demon. hey, not my fault! Do you have problems with bad thoughts? i guess that depends on your definition of "bad". if your talking about my recent obssession with [censored] and [censored], i consider that fun, not bad. That is/are (a) demon(s) in your mind, will or emotions. 11.11%, remember.

SPIRIT - Demons cannot get into your SPIRIT, but, the demons surround your SPIRIT like a glass jar surrounds its contents, and you have trouble serving the Lord JESUS. isn't that quite the image? The contents of the jar your spirit! cannot get out until you remove the lid (demons) i thought they were the jar. so, i'm just removing the lid, not the entire jar?. Deliverance can get rid of the demons. they thought that movie was scary? silly demons.

The URL for this main page is
http://www.demonbuster.com that is halfway down the damn page. hello, i know what the URL is because I'm already here, asshat!

BOYCE and BOICE are two demons that interfere with any electronic equipment, i.e., phone, computer, printer, automobile. If something malfunctions, command these two demons to leave your equipment, in the name of Jesus. We get many emails saying this worked. BWA HAHAHAHAHAHA!!!!!! Oh my Festivus, I can't breathe! Plug "boyce" or "boice" into google. They're pretty common last names, there's even a Boyce College in Kentucky.

Here's all the things Deliverance promises to cure:

Would you like help from being Depressed? psychiatrist. Abused? call the police! Afraid i guess it depends of what? Tormented? huh? Suicidal? go to the hospital. right now. Sick? ear infection or cancer? Alcoholic? Alcoholics Anonymous Addict? see previous. Obese? exercise, diet Homosexual (gay, lesbian)? that's not a problem, any more than my height is something which needs to be cured. Witch? hehehehe Satanist? you know it! Brotherhood? I have no idea with this is a reference to. Want out of the occult or a cult? Hooked on porno? worked for me! Dying? he's going to cure me of death? uh-huh. Diseased? that probably was covered under sick.

Molester? And stop. That's not funny. Jack Chick has pulled this one before, it wasn't acceptable or christian or even human from him, and it isn't from you either, fuckwad. How dare you? How dare you suggest that we should just make the molesters pray and everything will be just fine? You are evil. You should be locked in a room with a hundred molestation victims and be forced to listen- really listen- to what their molester did to them. And I don't mean where they got touched, I mean the shame and the loss and the sadness, the inability to trust, the feeling that they don't deserve love or respect or happiness. You listen to that, you motherfucker, and then you tell me all about "healing" the molesters.

Self-Abuse? masturbation or cutting? Bi-polar? psychiatrist Etc.? ??? Get Saved, then cast out these demons!

Print this out and pray it often. This is an anti-evil Prayer. aren't all prayers . . .

In the name of JESUS, I cover myself and the one reading this with the Blood of JESUS ewww! leave me out of that!. I ask for giant warrior angels hahahaha marcus fenix angels! to protect us. As your war club and weapons of war wha?, I break down, undam, and blow up all walls of protection around all witches, warlocks, wizards, satanists, sorcerers, and the like, and I break the power of all curses, hexes, vexes, spells, charms, fetishes, psychic prayers, psychic thoughts, all witchcraft, sorcery, magic, voodoo, all mind control, jinxes, potions, bewitchments, death, destruction, sickness, pain, torment, psychic power, psychic warfare, prayer chains, incense and candle burning, incantations, chanting, blessings, hoodoo, crystals, root works, and everything else being sent my way, basically, he believes ALL of this crap is real, a clear and present danger. or my family member's way, or any Deliverance Ministries way, and I return it, and the demons to the sender, SEVENFOLD, and I bind it to them by the Blood of Jesus, and I cut and burn their ungodly silver cord and lay lines hmmm? that's ley lines, for one thing, in JESUS' Name.

If you can hear the Oh the Blood of Jesus midi file, apparently there is some background song that I can't hear because I don't have sound on my computer at work. could someone please take one for the team and tell me what it's like? you know, hannah montana gets under my skin, too, is that casting out demons? how does he even know what demons do and don't like to listen to? oh, that's right, NIN is Teh Evil. and it gets under your skin, don't turn your speakers off. The demons absolutely hate this song or any song that is about the Blood of Jesus. The more this bothers you, the more demon infested you are. You actually could get some Deliverance by having this tune play in the background, and some demons may actually leave your home or apartment too. Tape the song and play it in your home over and over or just let it play on your computer.

moving on to personal care advice:

Did you know that apple cider or white vinegar is an effective deodorant? so smelling like cider or vinegar is in some way better than BO? You may not believe it, but it is true, and actually works. You must try it to see for yourself. Note: Vinegar use has nothing to do with demons. The point is that you must try and do Deliverance to see that it works. did you know that mint tea can help settle an upset stomach? this has nothing to do with anything. the point is that you must try atheism and see that it works. (actually, the tea thing is true. try celestial seasonings, it's 100% peppermint leaves from the pacific northwest. tasty!)

Apparently, religous idiocy has no boundaries.