Friday, January 16, 2009

Why I Don't Have to Watch Dawkins

So, now I know why it's never my turn to watch Richard Dawkins: it's this guy's job!

Unfortunately, he's not content with watching Richard Dawkins, he also has to make ridiculous guesses as to why people are atheists (hint: none of the below)

Sometimes these problems can be easily solved yet we lack the motivation or even the motivation to get at the heart of the problem now I an going to ask you why you are an atheist? this presupposes that atheism is a problem. it's not. i'm not affecting you at all. get over it.

- You read the works of Voltaire and became a convert? i converted to the group of people who never want to read voltaire again.

- You are a secret Luciferian Satanist? posing as an Atheist. why not pose as a theist? nobody really likes atheists more than satanists.

- You are a Communist? who is a pinko in this day and age? i've never met one, not in real life, not on the internet. where are all these commies?

_ You went to church when you were younger but never experienced God? the great childhood trauma of not experiencing god?

- You want to make yourself God and do not like competition? BWAHAHAHAHAHA

-You are a postmodernisand you believe that that there is no ultimate truth? what is a postmodernisand?

-You read the works of Charles Darwin and are writing manuscripts of the next “My Atheist Struggle”? is he referencing mein kampf? bad form, that

- A Catholic Priest made a pass at you and you blame God? what? is he making light of child molestation?

- You are secretly in love with Richard Dawkins and have not told your parents that you are not like other men? i'm not man. and if i were, that would make me like lots of other men- gay ones.

- You are not convinced evil exists. sure, right there in the hearts of men. satan, not so much.

_ You believe the ten commandments are harmful to the well being of human kind. who thinks that "thou shalt not kill" is harmful to people?

_ You are following a trend? yes, the great atheism trend of 2009, hitting malls this summer.

This is your turn to speak, I will comment on what you have to say. and tell you how wrong you are.

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