horus, jesus, egyptian, osiris, osirus, mary, lazarus, isis, religion, christian, bible, jews, god,
The next time someone talks to you about Jesus, ask them why they are mispronouncing his name. After all, the god they are worshipping, isn't Jesus, it's the Egyptian god Horus. Don't believe me? Let's examine the stories of Jesus and Horus.
Horus came first. In fact, the Horus stories had been common for centuries (in fact, Horus is mentioned around 3,000 BCE) in the Middle East prior to the coming of the Jewish messiah. And the Jews, shall we say, "borrowed" a little from the common mythology.
Horus' mother was named "Meri", and he was the only son of the god Osiris.
Jesus' mother was named "Mary", and he was the only son of the god Yhwh.
Horus' foster father was Jo-seph.
Jesus' foster father was Joseph.
Horus' earthly family was of royal descent.
Jesus' earthly family was of royal descent.
Horus' birth was announced to his mother by an angel.
Jesus' birth was announced to his mother by an angel.
Horus' birth was witnessed by shepards.
Jesus' birth was witnessed by shepards.
Horus' birth was later witnessed by three solar deities.
Jesus' birth was later witnessed by three "wise men".
While Horus was an infant, Herut tried to have him murdered.
While Jesus was an infant, Herod tried to have him murdered.
There is no information on Horus between the ages of 12 and 30.
There is no information on Jesus between the ages of 12 and 30.
Horus was baptized in a river by Anup the Baptiser. Anup was later beheaded.
Jesus was baptized in a river by John the Baptist. John was later beheaded.
Horus was tempted by being taken from the desert of Amenta up a high mountain by his arch-rival Sut. Sut (a.k.a. Set) was a precursor for the Hebrew Satan.
Jesus was taken from the desert in Palestine up a high mountain by his arch-rival Satan.
Both Horus and Jesus resist temptation.
Horus walked on water, cast out demons, healed the sick, restored sight to the blind. He "stilled the sea by his power."
Jesus walked on water, cast out demons, healed the sick, restored sight to the blind. He ordered the sea with a "Peace, be still" command.
Horus raised Osirus, his dead father, from the grave.
Jesus raised Lazarus from the grave.
Horus' resurrection of Osirus occurred in Anu, an Egyptian city where the rites of the death, burial and resurrection of Horus were enacted annually.
Jesus' resurrection of Lazarus occurred in Bethany. Hebrews added their prefix for house ('beth") to "Anu" to produce "Beth-Anu" or the "House of Anu." Since "u" and "y" were interchangeable in antiquity, "Bethanu" became "Bethany," the location mentioned in John 11.
Origin of Lazarus' name: Asar was an alternative name for Osirus, Horus' father, who Horus raised from the dead. He was referred to as "the Asar," as a sign of respect. Translated into Hebrew, this is "El-Asar." The Romans added the prefix "us" to indicate a male name, producing "Elasarus." Over time, the "E" was dropped and "s" became "z," producing "Lazarus."
Horus gave the Sermon on the Mount.
Jesus gave the Sermon on the Mount.
Horus died by crucifixion, accompanied by two thieves and was buried in a tomb.
Jesus died by crucifixion, accompanied by two thieves and was buried in a tomb.
Horus descended into Hell and was resurrected after three days.
Jesus descended into Hell; resurrected after about 30 to 38 hours (Friday PM to presumably some time in Sunday AM) covering parts of three days.
Horus' resurrection was announced by women.
Jesus' resurrection was announced by women.
Horus, it is said, will rule for 1,000 years (at some unidentified future time.)
Jesus, it is said, will rule for 1,000 years (at some unidentified future time.)
I say, from now on, we stop even discussing Jesus with anyone. We need to figure out when Horus' reign will be and get on that bus.
a needle's sympathy / the kindness of a gun / the monster in your head / the truth from which you run
Monday, March 16, 2009
30 comments:
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You know you're made of awesome? If you were a guy I would probably marry you.
ReplyDeleteThat is just brillant. I plan on pointing this out as much as I can.
So we become polygamists. It happens.
ReplyDeleteTrue, sometimes these things do happen. One minute a normal married couple, the next minute polygamists. Oops!
ReplyDeleteWell, now that gay people are married, we could well find ourselves in a polygamous relationship that involves robots and cats. Or so I've heard.
ReplyDeleteThat's true. And on the news this morning I saw that Japan has this new creepy looking woman robot that has human-like facial expressions and all manner of things. People could get married to her. It's only a matter of time.
ReplyDeleteI say let the robot lovers get married to their lovers. It would keep them from marrying innocent human women and making them miserable.
ReplyDeleteWe need to figure out when Horus' reign will be and get on that bus.
ReplyDeleteEnter numerology, the One True Science.
Wow, this is really interesting. Like Leigh, I plan to point this out. I thought that Zorastrians were the only preceding religion with striking similarities to Judaism/Christianity.
ReplyDeleteI though that was Creationism . . . I'm so confused!
ReplyDeleteThis drops my jaw all the way down to the floor with its Win.
ReplyDeleteAnd, that's funny - the Goat Mama and I were discussing Zoroastrianism yesterday as the precursor to Judeo-Christian-Islamic monotheism.
Don't even get me started on the conflation of the Bible with Paradise Lost and the Inferno.
ReplyDeleteas a candle-carrying-incense-burning-longhaired-hippy-pagan-gamer-chick, i tell you three times:
ReplyDeleteall gods are one god. Jesus/Horus/Krishna/etc.
but i had nevernevernever seen it laid out like that!
that is made of pure 100% unadulterated grade organic WIN
you have me buying organic now. tease :D
can i repost that with a link?
Please do. I would be quite complimented.
ReplyDeleteyou were rather a hit over at my LJ.
ReplyDelete"seawasp", the first commenter on my LJ, is Sci-Fu writer Ryk E. Spoor. he rocks, and needs to writer faster!
the other 3 are all personal friends. Christraven is a great funny guy, in vet-tech school, ADORES animals, and i used to set him on fire. Anivair is a Druid and does some tech work in the real world (at a company, i mean its his real job) and bakes the MOST DELICIOUS CAKES EVAR!! for my 26th (i think) birthday, he and my sister threw my a "fairy party" and he made me a fairy cake - miniature cupcakes that he formed into the shape of a fairy. he rocks. sadslacker i know less well, but he is unfailingly sweet and complemtary, and a few years ago i was playing a Fae who was shapechanged as a cat, and rubbed all over him (as the cat) and he just took it :)
i have told them all to come and visit and leave tribute.
okay, i totally need to host pagan parties.
ReplyDeleteI request citations. Most of this doesn't match any version of the Horus stories that I've read.
ReplyDeleteThis is just purely fantastic. I agree with danelian, that gods are just the same stories told with a differing world view. But this just takes the cake!
ReplyDeleteWhenever I rty to convey that I am telling the truth, I hold up my hands, palms to the sky and I say "Hands to the baby Jesus." Maybe now it should be "Hands to the baby Horus."
Great work!
"Hands to the baby Jesus" LOL!!
ReplyDeleteI like to tell people they're making baby Jesus cry.
purple: There's a link at the top to a site that is generally regarded as fair and accurate. Other than that, I could try to remember to get back to you, but I think that site has it's own list of citations at the end of the article.
its! itnoapostrophes! sheesh.
ReplyDeleteYeah. I read the page you link to. It talks about the lines of Pharaohs. It doesn't support any of these claims.
ReplyDeleteIt sounds like you found this somewhere, thought it was funny, and reposted it without caring much about its accuracy. That does a disservice to everyone reading it, because they accept it at face value.
I'm not Christian. I'm firmly in the agnostic camp. However, posting this kind of stuff without first checking to see if any of it is true, makes the "God doesn't exist and Jesus was just a man" arguments look really weak.
Click the first link, not the second link. The second link is a link to a page that discusses when in history the Horus story first comes up. I just checked the first link, it is correct. It links to religioustolerance.org, which is well known for being fair-minded and reasonably accurate. You want more accurate, go to a university. Unfortunately, I can't link to someone's doctoral thesis. (Well, some of them. Not all universities put them up online.)
ReplyDeleteAgnostic? Really?
Apologies, I missed it.
ReplyDeleteSo now that I've clicked the first link, I've noticed that most of the comparisons listed do not have citations, so there's no way to investigate their veracity. Of the ones that do, some of those citations are from sources that dispute the claim that the two are alike!
Finally, the last citation, #19, asks the reader to do a google search of "horus crucified" and I did, and most of the links again DISPUTE the claim that there is any story of Horus being crucified!
Here's a sample: http://paxblog.vox.com/library/post/zeitgeist-analysis-part-2.html
Came right from the Google search your source tells me to make.
This isn't scholarly by any means, but there is a preponderance of evidence against these comparisons verses the evidence for. So I still argue that someone made all this up.
That's it. I'm calling bullshit on the whole "agnostic" thing. You're agnostic but it pisses you off that the Horus story might be made up?
ReplyDeleteUh, hello, all religion is made up! Like Jesus actually walked on water or turned 5 fish into thousands.
You want how much proof of a 5,000 year old story? But I bet the equally old Jewish tales in the Old Testament don't bother you that much, do they?
Yeesh.
So you can't be agnostic and demand good scholarship? the whole point of the article is that the myth of crist and the myth of horuis are the same. Myths are made up, sure, but not on the fly. They have a history.
ReplyDeleteI find your research useful, however, some of it is inaccurate. Orthodox,Conservative, and Reform Jews do not in any way accept Jesus as a deity in any way. Our ancestors did not "borrow" anything from this mythology. Both Paul and Luke in the so called "New Testament" where both born and raised in the same general location as Alexander the Great which is Northern Greece. Hence, both were by Roman Law Roman Citizens. Paul was a man who sought power. He came up with a scheme to convert to Judaism with the disillusioned idea of marrying the daughter of the high priest. After Paul was rejected, the daughter of a priest can only marry a priest even today, he began taking Jewish texts and mixing in various pagan stories in order to bring in non Jews who where accustomed to such stories.
ReplyDeleteHowever the rest of your research is spot on, Thanks!
Hous' mother was Isis and father Osiris. The rest is wrong, too. Do your research, please, you kinda' sound like that Nigerian banker who emailed me (was it HIS son that is the knicker-bomber?)
ReplyDeleteA different take on the subject.
ReplyDeletehttp://stupidevilbastard.com/index/seb/comments/ending_the_myth_of_horus/
Anything pegged to a cult, I say you can let that bus pass. Theres only one God and that never changes. That's the side I choose, the captain of the ship, etc. Proud servant of God. -Samuel.
ReplyDeleteA major difference between Horus and Jesus is that Jesus' story is verified by historical facts, articals, and other trusted books written in that time period and trusted by historians. It is very hard to find solid historical evidence of anything Horus did.
ReplyDeleteThis Horus misinformation was made up by Gerald Massey.
ReplyDelete